My Oversoul-Self

Finally it struck me that there’s no such thing as “non-
being” & this is the key to understanding everything, I
thought existing was a victory over the defeat of being
dead forever; but it’s wrong since the physical world is
an illusion in which all particles only play a certain role

But when the show is over, the particles accept a new
role: consciousness is eternal within the vibrations we
interpret as the 3-dimensional hologram through these
laser-like lights produced by the brain cells - whatever
happens - non-existence is impossible, every thought,

Every theory, assumption and supposition we have ever
had is realised somewhere in the fractal multitude of our
realities; every dream, hallucination or virtual scene has
a place in some alternate universe where a suppressed
part of our consciousness fulfills all the dreams we tried

To hide from ourselves and the most wonderful thing is -
nothing we ever thought remains unspoken or unfulfilled
because every thought has a life of its own: the variable
in every choice finds its home someplace and we meet
up with the preferred outcome in a new version of the

Inter-subjective parts of reality we share - so let me not
lament the circumstances of my life as there is another
version of my reality where every rejected thought has
been carried out & so my choice of reality is based on
a myriad of possibilities that were analysed, weighed

And rejected by my Oversoul-Self…

All My Years [Rev]

A slow tortoise I divide each legal sentence into
small bits, check terms against each alternative
and paste the whole together again, knowing it
must be checked also after phrases have been
joined in the new synergy of another language

Without previous experience it’s hit-and-miss as
I choose what seems right to my inexperienced
eye, when it becomes just too much I read some
paragraphs in Pratchett’s Last Continent & enjoy
a Housekeeper’s victory over learned Wizards

Who are embarrassed when she teaches the god
of evolution about natural procreation so replacing
the slow process when assembling unique beings
piece by piece, many layers of meaning fascinate
with Evolution & Creationism theories juxtaposed

As gloriously unsubstantiated assumptions given
empirical positivism versus consciousness as the
driving principle of every precise detail - amazing
humanity in lying beyond a blind chaos of simple,
repetitive million-to-one-odds creative processes

Time slows down and I’m forever stuck in my now,
maybe it’s the portal spirituals always define as the
only reality - an eternal moment in which my spirit
will be stuck on one wavelength until a miraculous
subconscious movement to another wavelength –

To do this I listen to the most beautiful voice I can
find to silence my thoughts & touch my heart, with
this beautiful sound in my ears, I can live through
all my years spent in this infinity….

Follow The Light [Rev]

A sad solo floats on by as the lonely soloist, haughtily
disdained by a strong Valkyrian mezzo-soprano who
just deals with slain heroes to be shuttled to the Feast
in the Sky with Ho-to-yo; sings: ‘Think of me - think of
me fondly when we’ve said goodbye’ – a soft echo in
the empty stairwell where she’s stumbling, distraught

Scorned as ingénue by the noble sisters of a cloister
where words are slaughtered in a menacing silence,
never a song is heard, she flees to hide from the con-
demning Abbess‘ eyes and from Sister Self-Justified
ignoring Christine into non-existence; their disregard
destroy faith and trust so she has to leave this place

Finding refuge in her Favourite Things, images from
Nanny McPhee & Tinker Bell Fairy Dell supply proof
that Good exists, although the arrows of disdain find
their mark, life is sad as spinning straw the only way
she can CANNOT endear her to the Holy See & she
leaves in a dream sheltering in her inner cathedral

Where cloister-ideas are just a virtual reality without
Valkyries, where Indra’s pearls as mystical symbols
glimmer and glow, uniting light & sound in a joyous
new perspective within the understanding that dark-
ness is required as background to enable mankind
to find and follow the Light

Telling My Story [Rev]

The benevolent atmosphere, industrious dedication
of my colleagues and the kindness of our Boss who
lives in his own man-cave which I glimpse from time
to time; he asks what gives meaning to life, & I reply
the mere fact of existence, the triumph of being over
destruction and nothingness, the victory of our being

Free to choose where we go and what we do, playing
and challenges provide fun & our seeking adventure;
watching how people fall about on skate-boards and
jump from roof-tops and drive bicycles over the abyss
and somersault with speedboats and snow-mobiles -
life is more vibrant than ever and internationally the

Gloves are off, people don’t hide behind respectable
masks but present as blunt as Trump - the amazing
energy which infuses every day with new intrigues -
life’s purpose is JOY, growth happens automatically,
just to BE is our victory - even when we lament the
choices we have made everything can be changed

Every painting can be redone, every concert is the
stepping stone for a new twist in every tale weaving
new perspectives into the myths we still adore, and
though feelings come and go, by meditating on this
I floated downstream feeling the glory of telling my
story as a new discovery of the imagination people

Offer us - and refuge in which to recharge our life…

Crown of Thorns

I thought my brain was frozen like my
heart – but now I find my brain is made
of stone useless for analytic computer,
my brain fails - anxiety the bane of my
life - completely defenseless against
arrogance, open threat & aggression

Coming from a perfect saint teaching
creed to the Pharisees of Jerusalem
as she has never made a mistake in
her life – as she believes - and has a
mission to burn me at the stake since
I’m a heathen Pratchett acolyte who

Claims we made up the gods & that
includes her god also - thus Sisters
Self-Righteous and Apartheid-Jane
find it offensive that I use their divine
godliness in prayer and obtain results
YET I refuse to bow to church creed

I’m a bent reed Christ refused to break
BUT now they’ll show Him how they’ll
crucify the sinner they identified & I’m
as mute before my divine persecutors
as Christ was – though anxiety makes
my muscles twitch – and wonder now

Did Christ with his Crown of Thorns –
feel the same?

Line Of Notes (c)

Cast as Jane Eyre’s friend Helen Burns
persecuted by Miss Scatcherd - I listen to
the Nutcracker Suite over my earphones
and read advice not to observe life as it is,
but imagine it as I want it to be - I escape
into a parallel reality, another dimension

Where an orchestra plays the prelude to
La Traviata and Marie Plessis explains to
Victor Hugo’s son she can’t live in a rural
town, she needs to be in the lively hub of
Parisian life even if it kills her through her
serious illness, but Jane Eyre returns and

Reveals her sister Maria died within the
death of Helen Burns – I had better try it
again and take a different tack to follow
a new dream - sing Les Oiseaux dans la
Charmille in Hoffman’s Magical Tales, the
Doll Song - so I become an automaton

Who translates strange documents which
change in front of my hallucinating eyes in-
to droll incantations harnessing the power
in sound to redo reality until my spirit sings
a jubilant line of notes in a bittersweet song…

Nothing More

This day has splintered into a thousand pieces,
I constructed another bubble to hide my mind
from the fall-out and continue working, but then
the bubble was burst for me and I’m constrained
to construct yet another one, even more fragile
than anything that came before, to enable me to
stay upright and continue until it’s time to go home

Constructing bubbles is the only way I know that
makes it possible to continue when my world
keeps breaking like the most delicate porcelain
and I wonder if plastic would be a better option,
precious materials like glass and porcelain break
into shards and my heart is pierced every time it
happens, please stop trying to improve me –

I’ve had a lifetime of trying to improve myself & the
result is totally disheartening, there is only one way
correction can come, that is death and starting over
with a new mind and a new brain mechanism, a new
reptilian core unmarked by these failures that have
continued to plague me from earliest youth, please
just accept that I am trying my best - though

The result is never good enough, it’s all I have to
give - there is nothing more in my arsenal…