Look Where I Like What I See

Venison, venison pie, got at Mondanette,
the best place to buy lovely venison pie,
tossing in bed, no sleep, no drowsiness,
no interest in life – typical symptoms that
venison pie is dangerous, but it is divine

If only it would allow me to rest, to close
my eyes, but no, even that luxury is denied,
eyelids refuse to stay down, staring wide
awake in the night, a good time to read,
if only I had some interest

Being so listless, all because of intolerance
for the ingredients in venison pie, no wonder
there are many versions of me, the mind that
was me is wiped clean of feelings by this weird
occurrence, left tabula rasa emotionally

Only my knowledge remains scathe-free, with
my feelings all gone I need to rebuild an emotional
context anew every time; I return to my books and
repeat the same words until I’ve become the same
kind of person I’ve been before the symptoms

Numbed a part of my brain, maybe emotions simply
return after an absence, but it requires repetition of
the same stimuli to become me – and you wonder
why I fear negative things and hide from bad news?
Because I have no emotional reference

To cushion the shock of idiotic decisions and hostility
emphasised by the media; I have no protection against
the impact of every provocative term or event – thus, I
only look where I like what I see, if my eyes notice
anything amiss I look away – respectfully

Knowing people are free to create every possibility,
but experience has taught me my food intolerance
made me intolerant of all negativity, only positive
thoughts and events, spiritual ideas and the power
of love can pick me up

Once the allergy destroyed my judgement and love
of life – by keeping my eyes resolutely on positive
things, I regain my balance without falling into
several mental black holes at once!