Confused Between Laughing, Crying…

There we have it – nosebleed – for eating all
those killer pies, although I can still survive
after eating a Russian and cheese pie
using Vicks Vaporub for breathing, it
still has devastating effects

Now it’s back to the straight and narrow - hot
chocolate ice-cream for breakfast - and I’m so
confused, alternating between laughing, crying,
happiness and fear; reading about the ordeals
of Sister Luke, the Nun Gabrielle

In the Congo, the reaction of people to her, her
religious order’s insistence that she reject all
love and acceptance, which means that she
must even reject the admiration and love I
as a reader experience while reading

This is too much, I can’t live with so much self-
abnegation; I MUST be able to send my love
and affection back to her through space-time
that is all stretched out before us as Einstein
contended - I MUST help her

I can’t read books if I’m not allowed to help
the original characters in one way or
another!