The Real Perpetrator [REVISED]

We meet with Anne - a small, dark, dapper figure
hinting at dark intrigue telling us Conan - our Dad*
received thousands from Dr-Know-It-All, her Dad*
rumoured to have squandered a fortune upon Conan

‘tis enthralling; where’d Conan hide his stash, when
did he take charge of it and to whom did he pass it -
BUT Duchess says impossible, Dad never enters a
bank on his own, this is a cover for one with access

To Dr-Know-It-All’s money; Duchess* & I look at
each other - agreeing we shan’t challenge this great
idea to protect the identity of the one who fabricated
this cover story, we can’t ever tell Conan, given that

He’s expert at cursing - though dad never mastered
banking, he would argue his case vehemently in the
most aggressive tones and the romantic tales of his
shenanigans is dad’s only claim to fame, as long as

Anne doesn’t accuse him to his face; Duchess and
I relish the fact that the two brothers*  helped each
Other, the Queen-Of-Hearts* said Conan  gave his
brother Dr-Know-It-All money;  the converse now

Claimed by Anne: the truth is lost with the death of
Dr Know-It-All, asking Dad will cause trouble - to
picture blunt, bumbling Conan as the scam’s author
is so absurd we burst out laughing - knowing that

We shall always protect the real perpetrator from
Anne’s terrifying volcanic wrath…

[our Dad* = Conan the Barbarian, father of Duchess and Alice

Her Dad* = Doctor-Know-It-All, father of Anne and her sister ‘Twinkles’

*Duchess = I am Alice and Duchess is my twin sis

*the Queen-Of-Hearts = Conan’s wife, mother of Duchess
and Alice]