Feeling Boredom And Nihilism

Started the day the breakfast way cold medication
following rules and regulations guaranteed to cure
everyone from what ails them, what with my allergy
I have managed to become depressed, lethargic all
compounded by a feeling of boredom and nihilism
life as meaningless, the single unit of NOW time, the
ubiquitous present is become a gaping emptiness
stuck without interest ensnared in existential questions

The why of existence, the ethical imperative, my own
desire for inspiration finding none trying to work up
motivation even less of that around, I am bound in a
prison of my own making, a slice of bread deadly, dry
biscuits double dose of Unheil und Elend, only a Terry
Pratchett could save me, no book at hand only Abraham’s
assurance we are in charge of our own lives so comforting
to know this is a mess of my own making

I read in 'Why Me, Why This, Why Now?' by Robin Norwood
we even chose our parents, date of birth and life-problems
ourselves, Wayne Dyer confirms this, even before I entered
this vale of tears I had chosen the allergy - the only possible
reason must be that I am such a glutton without it I would have
waddled worse than a duck, even with that restriction I manage
to gain weight until I look like a wobbling walrus with a smile, I
must have known how valuable the experience of existential angst

Would be in grounding me in the 21st century that must be
reason I chose it but on days like today bored out of my wits
when even running away seems a boring alternative I am
most heartily sorry about the pre-birth choices I supposedly
made and would rather change them…