My Brother Genghis

Why is it every time a family member dies,

we have so much fun, we laugh and laugh,

but when the lights go out and I’m alone in

bed at night, I cry and cry? Why can’t the

laughter stay with me as I say a prayer &

get into bed and stare into the dark - joy

gone, sadness constricting my throat as

I’m laying there, wishing I could sing 

a lullaby Aber Heidschi Bumbeidschi...

 

When the Queen of Hearts died, it was

delight as she suffered so much because

of her legs; as Conan expired, morphine

to stop the pain, I was glad for him as he

sighed ‘I have to die-just don’t know how’

then my brother Genghis gave up, tired of

knowing he was Tom Thumb inside, thus

deciding to sever spirit from body to seek

the light - now I’m waiting for him to...

 

Come calling to listen to the Nutcracker

Suite, he and I with stacks of records -

listening over and over: dreaming of

becoming the happy people we only

imagined in our minds…

 

[Tuesday, 15 March 2022]

[Aber Heidschi Bumbeidschi schlaf lange, es ist deine Mutter ausgangen, 

und ist sie gegangen und kehrt nicht mehr heim, und lässt ihr klein’s Bübchen 

so ganz allein, aber Heidschi Bumbeidschi bum bum...]