Albertus Adriaan Van Wyk

*

I was driving hubby’s new car when my father said
“I have no respect for anything that belongs to me,
you are my child, I have no respect for you, and I
don’t respect your car”

So I said “This is hubby’s car” and my father said
“I respect your husband, and I respect this car if it
belongs to him” so I added, taking refuge in my
life “And I am hubby’s wife

And my kids belong to him also, we do not belong
to you” and my father reiterated that he respects
my husband - my father feels so tainted and bad,
so evil and objectionable, he believes

Everything that belongs to him is tainted by his pre-
sence, I understand why he feels this way since he
was rejected by his own mother and his wife re-
jected him also, she could not love the kids

Fathered by him, he never learnt respect or self-
esteem; though I fear mother’s strange accusa-
tions, I fear my father’s lack of respect even
more, I cannot be his child for his sake

So he can respect me, my father felt I was tainted
by being his child, never provided for my studying,
but my brother Ian Albertus (named after grandma
Alice’s husband, Albertus Adriaan van Wyk)

Who raised me, provided the money; he knew I read
the books he gave me, knew who I was, he made a
tree seat for me, showed me how to climb up,
taught me how to flee the turmoil at home

By climbing onto the roof of our house, he created
my imaginary friends, calling them “Veldmaats”
one I called Xenia, Ian provided money to go
to university, while my father did not

Provide for my studies, mother wanted her sons to
become missionaries, Ian opposed her and went
to the army, with his pay he sent me to realize
my dreams and came there himself

I do not worry when someone talks about chattel, by
belonging to someone I cut the bond with my father,
giving him a gift: Now he can respect me…
*