Nothing Beneath (Revised)

Arose early, planned sleeping late,
my son made fun of me, saw my own
clumsiness through his mocking eyes,
wished I could change myself –
how silly I seemed

Planned finishing my translation,
read lines over and over without
registering meaning, wanted to
progress my evaluation, cannot
concentrate on work today

Need to seek my third thoughts,
wake background consciousness,
transcend sensory reality – I am not
functioning, robotic brain distraught,
all wavelengths scrambled

I feel so alone, destitute, lost, cannot
communicate my inability to anyone,
cannot describe this experience,
need a safe place to recuperate
from the fatigue of thought process

I feel so isolated in lonely darkness,
no voice understands, no dream
remains as all visions and concepts
flow away, I am left on reality’s surface
with nothing beneath…