Spirit Unwilling To Go On

Thought you were ill, worried about your health
put you to bed, held you tight, then tonight, as
soon as you felt better, you warned me that I was
to face reprimands for my bad conduct, my bad
performance as mother and wife

I sighed; I thought we were friends – I was wrong,
of course, you were angry with me for being tired
at the wrong moment and admitting as much, me
showing anger because fatigue took my power of
dissemblance away

I could not play that I felt wonderful while dead on
my feet – my fault entirely, I admit, I should have
been able to take the strain, as I expressed my joy
in your renewed health on seeing you well, you
warned me about the dire consequences

Of my being remiss in fulfilling duty and serving the
home, taking care of you and the children, I sighed,
you are right, I am such a bad caretaker, such a bad
serving person, I should be shot – but no-one ever
comes near enough to finish me off

I always run before they can kill me, I’m sorry, my
body is strong, though the spirit is
unwilling to go on…