Rocking up at work a promising 30 degrees
ready to face life in the volcano, enjoying the
hellish joy of disintegrating steadily as heat
increases, a forlorn voice calls I will not come
in today it’s too hot, you are all strong so you
can bear it but I cannot shall not will not
We have a bad soldier we realize, when firing
starts she will not remain to cover comrades
we have to work together but she stays in the
trenches saying I am fragile I insist on my rights
I cannot work so hard, since you do not mind
the work of slaves I’ll stay in the shade
An army relying on soldiers like that will not
get very far claiming superiority to those willing
to labor demeaning us for being at work in spite
of heat that makes it impossible to breathe but
we suffer together we help each other carry
each other’s burdens, we’re a team!
Monday, August 31, 2009
Dancing My Father’s Steps
I am mesmerised by Heino singing
about Mädchen in Tirol, dancing my
father’s steps when there is yodelling
Esme and Gilberto sing a song I heard
ages ago on Springbok radio, my father
will be listening with me alone in his flat
I enjoy swinging all over the kitchen floor
sakkie-sakkie and a boere-settees all by
myself, tomorrow I’ll call him to find out
What he thought of the music, the rhythms
call me to dance, I see a troupe swaying
with me in my mind’s eye -
- feeling simply delicious!
Listening to Radio Pretoria knowing my father
listens every night and feeling near to him.
(Esme Everard)
about Mädchen in Tirol, dancing my
father’s steps when there is yodelling
Esme and Gilberto sing a song I heard
ages ago on Springbok radio, my father
will be listening with me alone in his flat
I enjoy swinging all over the kitchen floor
sakkie-sakkie and a boere-settees all by
myself, tomorrow I’ll call him to find out
What he thought of the music, the rhythms
call me to dance, I see a troupe swaying
with me in my mind’s eye -
- feeling simply delicious!
Listening to Radio Pretoria knowing my father
listens every night and feeling near to him.
(Esme Everard)
The Problem With Parables
Parables pose serious questions, whenJesus said He knocks on our hearts and
if we open unto Him, He comes in, I am
worried that if the person within is bound
with strings, scared and gagged, not able
to open the door, however much they want
to break free, will Jesus turn away and leave
me be? He should open the door and save
me instead of waiting while the devil is
singing and laughing and dancing with
glee, though a happy devil sounds so
enticing, I cannot fear him as religion
recommends, still; it is unfair to expect
an idiot to open the door, it should be
done for me; though I try with all my
might, I cannot open the door to my
heart, and it is not fair, not fair at all!
Local Kingsley Centre Volcano
My nerves, my poor nerves,
I must ask my employer to excuse me duty
because of them – wherever I went today,
Unheil happened, first hubby didn’t pay off
our credit card, I used an invalid one, ID
confiscated, my sandal broke
Hellish temperature of 29 degrees C, air-con
set to HOT in the open-plan office, Jane et al
suffocating while I pour water over my hair, the
perfect scenario, I ascended the pole to talk to
Hermien and proved it works for a movie scene
but no Broccoli with a James Bond movie deal
My boring complainant document is singing a
plaintive lament on the terrible evil of Trade and
Industry practices, Momo lost her friends, she
is lost and alone just like me, the beautiful rose
melodies she heard in unfolding time locked in
her heart, I waste my wonderful life moments
Reading nonsensical words, hiding my fantasies;
tonight I shall prepare floating devices to keep
me high above reality when I come back to work
in our local Kingsley Centre volcano…
I must ask my employer to excuse me duty
because of them – wherever I went today,
Unheil happened, first hubby didn’t pay off
our credit card, I used an invalid one, ID
confiscated, my sandal broke
Hellish temperature of 29 degrees C, air-con
set to HOT in the open-plan office, Jane et al
suffocating while I pour water over my hair, the
perfect scenario, I ascended the pole to talk to
Hermien and proved it works for a movie scene
but no Broccoli with a James Bond movie deal
My boring complainant document is singing a
plaintive lament on the terrible evil of Trade and
Industry practices, Momo lost her friends, she
is lost and alone just like me, the beautiful rose
melodies she heard in unfolding time locked in
her heart, I waste my wonderful life moments
Reading nonsensical words, hiding my fantasies;
tonight I shall prepare floating devices to keep
me high above reality when I come back to work
in our local Kingsley Centre volcano…
Boring Boks Donning Toks
Time to wave goodbye to aller Elend
apply recommendations, eat, drink, be
merry, laughing at depression, focus on
a brilliant vision I would love to explore
until distanced from the cause and can
ridicule it appropriately
Hope you focus on washing dishes and
bed without another thought in your merry
head, thank you for your trouble, may the
spicy food not make you wobble or suffer
as you dream of rugby games, boring
Boks donning toks
Winning in such an exciting way the second
world cup for flamboyantly arrogant Wallabies
needs new justification for existence, Boks are
probably too dangerous and inflict too much
pain, we need a stylish cup where elegance
is the name of the game…
Springbok fairytale reflecting on the whys
and wherefores of rugby games
apply recommendations, eat, drink, be
merry, laughing at depression, focus on
a brilliant vision I would love to explore
until distanced from the cause and can
ridicule it appropriately
Hope you focus on washing dishes and
bed without another thought in your merry
head, thank you for your trouble, may the
spicy food not make you wobble or suffer
as you dream of rugby games, boring
Boks donning toks
Winning in such an exciting way the second
world cup for flamboyantly arrogant Wallabies
needs new justification for existence, Boks are
probably too dangerous and inflict too much
pain, we need a stylish cup where elegance
is the name of the game…
Springbok fairytale reflecting on the whys
and wherefores of rugby games
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Opportunities To Be Joyous
As a child I tried Fundamentalism to replace the
lack of miracles in our brand of Protestantism
impressed by Revelations’ expectation of Arma-
geddon, using toothache to prepare for the
persecution of believers
Suffering torture in silence, when pain became
unbearable I could not be a martyr for God, my
endurance used up my powers, I could not sing
God’s praises in prison as Paul did, I confessed
the pain to my parents
Discovering hedonism, happiness and fun are
more important than suffering for a good cause
today I refuse all irrational suffering, enjoying the
fun of creative freedom, I am impervious to the
ethical imperative of sacrifice
My attempts to follow this moral dictum proved it
unnatural, believing we are born with a flawed human
nature convicts everybody to eternal damnation, living
life on this premise creates hell on earth, rejecting the
idea we were born to suffer
We are free to choose the exciting pain of intrigue or
the sweet joy of golden happiness, I always prefer
bright opportunities to be joyous...
lack of miracles in our brand of Protestantism
impressed by Revelations’ expectation of Arma-
geddon, using toothache to prepare for the
persecution of believers
Suffering torture in silence, when pain became
unbearable I could not be a martyr for God, my
endurance used up my powers, I could not sing
God’s praises in prison as Paul did, I confessed
the pain to my parents
Discovering hedonism, happiness and fun are
more important than suffering for a good cause
today I refuse all irrational suffering, enjoying the
fun of creative freedom, I am impervious to the
ethical imperative of sacrifice
My attempts to follow this moral dictum proved it
unnatural, believing we are born with a flawed human
nature convicts everybody to eternal damnation, living
life on this premise creates hell on earth, rejecting the
idea we were born to suffer
We are free to choose the exciting pain of intrigue or
the sweet joy of golden happiness, I always prefer
bright opportunities to be joyous...
CJ Langenhoven Die Eensame Hoop
Die Eensame Hoop van Suid Afrika
‘n Nooientjie wat baie, baie mooi is
fraaie rooi wangetjies en blou ogies
wat soos sterretjies vonkel, haartjies
goud van kleur, op haar kop dra sy ‘n
kroontjie van skitterende diamante wat
net soos haar ogies en sterretjies vonkel
Haar naam is die Hoop van Suid-Afrika
Vader Tyd vertel haar van ‘n klein nasie,
die Hollanders, wat tagtig jaar teen die
grote Spanje geveg het vir vryheid en sy
verklaar: Dit is die nasie wat ek hier wil hê
hulle is dapper genoeg vir my woeste land
Nadat ek Langenhoven se Eensame Hoop
weer gelees het, verstaan ek waar my nasie
hier aan die Suidpunt van Afrika aan hul
strydlustigheid teen alle oorheersing kom,
die Hollandse bloed vloei sterk in ons are,
gewoond daaraan om hulle te verset
Teen Anglo-Sakse en Spanjaarde, hulle is
gewoond aan oorlogvoering, geen wonder
hulle wou nie kopgee toe hulle Europese
oorheersers hulle hier aan die Suidpunt
van Afrika kom onderwerp het nie, dan-
kie tog ons is tagtig jaar oorlog gespaar
Vandag is hier ‘n mengsel van Europese nasies
Engelse, Franse, Duitsers, Spanjaarde, Portugese,
Italianers en Grieke leef saam met die heerlikste
mense op aarde, die inheemse volke van Afrika
die warmste, vreugdevolle nasies wat nog ooit op
aarde bestaan het
Kleintyd het ek Hoop die eerste keer gelees, dis tyd
dat ons die ou storie herskryf sodat Mabalêl, Amakaia
en Sneeuwitjie van die veld bymekaar kan staan, ons
moet die Langenhoven van 1873 opdateer…
CJ Langenhoven Versamelde Werke Deel 6
Tafelberg Uitgewers Beperk 1972
“Die Eensame Hoop” pp. 10-12, pp 48- 49
Translation:
The Lonely Hope of South Africa - [CJ Langenhoven circa 1873]
A girl - very, very beautiful - all red cheeks
and sapphire blue eyes that sparkle like
stars, her hair golden in color, and on her
head she wears a little crown of sparkling
diamonds that sparkling just like her eyes,
a small golden anchor adorning her tunic
Her name is the Hope of South Africa and
Father Time tells her about a small nation,
the Dutch, who fought for eighty long years
against Spain for their freedom, and Hope
replies: ‘The Dutch is the nation I want here,
they are brave enough for my forlorn country’
Reading Langenhoven's story about the Lonely
Hope clarifies the origin of our resistance here
at the Southern tip of Africa - against all foreign
invasions, Dutch courage strengthen our hearts,
our Dutch forbears didn't want to give up when
European forces tried to overpower us in Africa
Today various European nations are living here
united with the most wonderful people on earth,
the indigenous peoples of Africa, the warmest,
most joyful nations on earth
CJ Langenhoven - 1873
CJ Langenhoven Versamelde Werke Deel 6
Tafelberg Uitgewers Beperk 1972
“Die Eensame Hoop” pp. 10-12, pp 48- 49
Friday, August 28, 2009
All Smug And Satisfied
Playtime when I was eight or nine
changed me into an old Anglo Boer
War spy; I stood on cut tree trunk
and spied my fingers over my eyes
When the bell rang I ran to my post
for reconnaissance on the tree trunk
turned slowly looking at plants, the
rising hillside for encroaching enemies
All too soon the bell rang returning us
to a stuffy classroom, I all smug and
satisfied with my secret spying from
a book I was reading at the time
*********************************
HJ Vermaas “Oë Oor Die Einders”
“Die Perdedief” is egter sy mooiste boek.
‘Danster my Glanster', die manier waarop
die perdedief sy liefde vir perde verwoord
en die skrywer se woordkombinasies, min
of meer soos 'songestreel', is betowerend.
changed me into an old Anglo Boer
War spy; I stood on cut tree trunk
and spied my fingers over my eyes
When the bell rang I ran to my post
for reconnaissance on the tree trunk
turned slowly looking at plants, the
rising hillside for encroaching enemies
All too soon the bell rang returning us
to a stuffy classroom, I all smug and
satisfied with my secret spying from
a book I was reading at the time
*********************************
HJ Vermaas “Oë Oor Die Einders”
“Die Perdedief” is egter sy mooiste boek.
‘Danster my Glanster', die manier waarop
die perdedief sy liefde vir perde verwoord
en die skrywer se woordkombinasies, min
of meer soos 'songestreel', is betowerend.
Creating My Own Fairyland
Playground of our old school is awonderland of rising hillock with
steep sides abounding in small
holes turned into fairy dells
I swept them with a broom
exposed coloured stones
leaf decorated, artfully
arranged fir tree needles
I remember fresh smell, sunbeams
glistening in dust, beauty of my
fairy valley, joy and peace
played alone, by myself
The dream of creating fairyland
lingers on in glittering fairy
figurines next to
my bed
Pasting fairy pictures everywhere
changing every space into a
magical place
****************
The memory was triggered when I reread
Momo by Michael Ende:
Time Thieves took the time away
gave kids detailed robots and other
gizmos leaving no room for imagination
only Momo and her friends played with
ancient boxes and wooden sticks in the
honoured way, old debris became
anything they wished
Michael Ende “Momo” K. Thienemanns Verlag
Stuttgart 1973
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Book In Which Bianca Lives
Yawning while regarding my boringdocument, keeping a book next to my
computer, the cover illustrated with a
picture of the Fantora family
Rosie floating into the air, Filomena -
knitting needles in her hat - holding her
down, Eddie sucking green fingers, Aunt
Varvara in her green gauze wedding net
With butterflies brought to life by Bianca
Francesca making the weather change
and Marco disappearing slowly maybe
because his rhymes are atrocious
I wish I could re-experience the joy of Aunt
Varvara’s wedding to Remo, the smiling
Italian who serenaded her on the eve of
their magical prenuptials
I wish I had Bianca here to bring my three
dolls, the fairy on my computer, the silver
ballerina, the beautiful dragonfly and small
birds to life, but most of all
To animate this family illustration on the
cover of the book in which Bianca lives!
Adèle Geras “The Fantora Family Photographs”
Hamish Hamilton 1993
The Adèle Geras Web Site
Googled Adèle Geras on Google Images to find theillustration of “The Fantora Family Photographs”
discovered the beauty of The Adèle Geras Web
Site at adelegeras.com, the illustrations for her
Book “Cleopatra” are enchanting, herewith an
example to keep near me always…
Ragdolls On Bureaucracy’s Door-Step
--- Eternally young, I will rejoice while repeating mywell-known song ---
Deepak Chopra mentions experiments
where old people taken back to their youth
environment were rejuvenated in body and
soul, I smiled, this is what I do all the time
Rereading the stories and books of my youth
Alice In Wonderland is lined up next to my bed
I have Keurboslaan ready, time to reread the
1933 Bible translation in Afrikaans
Reliving my youth by reciting Psalm 23 - ‘Die
Here is my herder, Hy laat my neerlê in groen
weivelde, na waters waar rus is, lei Hy my heen’
adding Anna Rudolph’s songs
‘In sy skadutjie rondom sy stam op die grond staan
my boompie die hele dag rond’ en ‘Ons is die blom-
metjies blou en geel, ons staan waar ons staan want
ons kan nêrens gaan…’
Darn, this is a description of our life as government
officials – ‘Here we stand simply because we can go
nowhere else’ - loss of freedom clearly delineated in
the songs of my youth
Let me add ‘Iemand het ‘n lappop op die ashoop weg-
gegooi, sy was gedaan en stukkend, gelap en nie meer
mooi, op die ashoop hoor sy stemme praat en die
verwelkom haar, maar oe ellendig
Toe sy kyk, wat sien die lappop daar’ – tears are stinging
my eyes, we are the ragdolls left on bureaucracy’s door-
step, darned and broken, see senior officials reduced
to despondency and bitter smiles
Living tattered lives in a corporate nightmare ‘Net ‘n vrot
pampoen en ‘n stukkende skoen, ‘n verlepte angelier en
‘n leë bottel bier, ‘n ou grammafoonplaat en ‘n kous sonder
maat, ‘n gelapte binneband en ‘n ou koerant’
I recognise us in this motley assortment, an old pumpkin and
a broken shoe, a wilted carnation, an empty can of beer, an
old gramophone record, a lonely sock, a patched tube, an old
journal’ - I must be the old gramophone record
Turning over and over in the same groove; luckily according to
Deepak Chopra, Eastern guru par excellence, this procedure
keeps me eternally young, so I will rejoice while repeating my
well-known song…
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Free As A Bird
This morning I came here as me, butwith a new fantasy, delighted by my
new story, a new situation where I as
an undercover spy acted as a protocol
officer which gives me opportunity to
infiltrate enemy lines with access to
classified information
Working out all the rules of the game
adventures keep my mind occupied and
my eyes shining, I refrain from acting as
mediator between a complainant and the
hierarchy as that would worsen her case
my words would destabilise the situation
as my attempts to represent myself
Did many years before, I recommend that
she submit to bureaucracy and corporate
environment without insisting on human
rights, she gave up her right to freedom
and initiative the day she accepted the
job, just as we did at school, the system
is devised as slavery with total control
Unless we bend and let the tide carry us, we
break in our resistance, when I was new to the
game I resisted authority and was broken in a
million places, today I am healed without a scar
and live happily in servitude, my mind
as free as a bird in the sky…
Withdraw Into Our Shell
A Cheshire Cat SmileWhen it turns dark outside, when fear
and anxiety threaten, when depression
becomes overwhelming and we try to
call out for help and stern faces become
angry and turn away, admonishing us to
reflect upon our sins and stop bothering
good citizens, to strive for excellence
Then the ideal of self-improvement loses its
power to guide, our mental gyroscope starts
turning wildly without sense of direction, we
are lost on a sea of uncertainty without the
right or ability to enlist help in solving our
problems – then it is time to withdraw as
deep as possible into our shell
Escape existential pain by curtailing existence
cutting off parts of ourselves and burying them
in places inaccessible, donning a mask to face
the outside world, playing a role, being a clown
killing the feeling of nihilism by deleting that part
of ourselves where the feeling is manifesting
hiding dark thoughts in the mind
When we try to explain what is bothering us and
we encounter hostility, outright rejection and strict
injunction to follow rules or suffer the consequences
while shortcomings and inadequacies are emphasized
we lose the channel of communication with the outside
world - only by diminishing ourselves to a Cheshire cat
smile are we allowed attempt at expression
Of the miniscule part of ourselves that are acceptable
to our fellow-men...
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
The Snake Of Humiliation
Filomena Fantora tells the future by
looking at her knitting, Bianca can
bring anything to life, dolls speak
ornaments move, illustrations are
animated
Marco has the gift of invisibility, enjoys
writing poetry, Francesca can change
the weather while aunt Varvara is a
vegetarian vampire, an uneasy com-
bination
Her husband Remo Lupino comes from
a long line of illustrious Italian werewolves
I sigh in perfect contentment, this is exactly
the kind of family I want to read, dream, talk
think about
My favourite is Marco the poet, he knows
invisibility is a prerequisite when exposing
his feelings and thoughts; today I shall be
invisible also, wear my earphones to block
the sounds of conflict
As Jane, who does not know how to be humble
and obedient, rebels against the guidance sup-
plied by June who cut her teeth in a teaching
environment and cannot understand the inability
of her latest student
To submit to rules of any kind, does not comprehend
a bureaucracy is a game of snakes and ladders where
you throw the dice to be swallowed by the snake of
humiliation until you ascend the next ladder again
only to fall and break your neck…
Adèle Geras “The Fantora Family Photographs”
Hamish Hamilton 1993 - Quotes from pp. 1-4
looking at her knitting, Bianca can
bring anything to life, dolls speak
ornaments move, illustrations are
animated
Marco has the gift of invisibility, enjoys
writing poetry, Francesca can change
the weather while aunt Varvara is a
vegetarian vampire, an uneasy com-
bination
Her husband Remo Lupino comes from
a long line of illustrious Italian werewolves
I sigh in perfect contentment, this is exactly
the kind of family I want to read, dream, talk
think about
My favourite is Marco the poet, he knows
invisibility is a prerequisite when exposing
his feelings and thoughts; today I shall be
invisible also, wear my earphones to block
the sounds of conflict
As Jane, who does not know how to be humble
and obedient, rebels against the guidance sup-
plied by June who cut her teeth in a teaching
environment and cannot understand the inability
of her latest student
To submit to rules of any kind, does not comprehend
a bureaucracy is a game of snakes and ladders where
you throw the dice to be swallowed by the snake of
humiliation until you ascend the next ladder again
only to fall and break your neck…
Adèle Geras “The Fantora Family Photographs”
Hamish Hamilton 1993 - Quotes from pp. 1-4
Threw Him Some Fairy Dust
My positive book says not to go for quantum
leaps, rather effect a change in small increments
it does not work for me, either deeply depressed
or totally joyous, after attending the most boring
meeting ever on planet earth, I struck an all-time
low and could not wait for incremental joy
I immediately called up my three-year-old self and
went marching to the library, on my return we went
off to collect our new T-shirts where I saw Cindy
donned all in pink, started singing “Let’s take a
drink, a drink, a drink, to Lily the Pink, the Pink,
the Pink, the saviour of the human race
For she invented medicinal compound, most
efficacious in every way” dancing away while
swinging my new T-shirt like a matador, getting
in everyone’s way, Dr Jokweni said he wanted
some of my energy so I threw him some fairy
dust, his face beaming now
A big smile - while I’m running
through my day!
leaps, rather effect a change in small increments
it does not work for me, either deeply depressed
or totally joyous, after attending the most boring
meeting ever on planet earth, I struck an all-time
low and could not wait for incremental joy
I immediately called up my three-year-old self and
went marching to the library, on my return we went
off to collect our new T-shirts where I saw Cindy
donned all in pink, started singing “Let’s take a
drink, a drink, a drink, to Lily the Pink, the Pink,
the Pink, the saviour of the human race
For she invented medicinal compound, most
efficacious in every way” dancing away while
swinging my new T-shirt like a matador, getting
in everyone’s way, Dr Jokweni said he wanted
some of my energy so I threw him some fairy
dust, his face beaming now
A big smile - while I’m running
through my day!
The Great Escape To Wonderland
Hot, hot, hot, we are melting in ourJames Bond office, my feet burning
after marching to the library, oh joy
got all my delectable favourites to
effect an escape from drudgery
The promising meeting was just a bore
Berlitz’s Dragon Triangle offered no
mesmerising surprises, off I went to my
favourite hang-out, in a frenzy of self-
indulgence took out my favourites
Goblin Party, Alice and Momo and in a
spirit exuberance added The Fantora
Family Photographs by Adèle Geras
a new book I have not read before, a
real treat, quickly edit my translation
To make the day pass double-quick so
I can make the great escape to
Wonderland tonight!
25 August 2009
Monday, August 24, 2009
Joyous Interpretation
Delighted surprise, staring in happy
conjecture and expectant surmise at the
beautiful message emblazoned in golden
letters in my dairy: An NLS staff meeting at
ten thirty today
What joy awaits me, what wonderful things our
Chief Director will say, what delicious solecisms
and anecdotes to digest and new ideas to imbibe
how can I describe the field of infinite possibilities
that may be?
I shall take my music along, of course, listening to The
Merry Widow focuses my mind so that I hear more than
the others listening in cold blood; my book also, just in
case a quiet moment should present, I cannot endure
sitting in boredom for long
During the last meeting, Jane, the only English mother-
tongue speaker in the Department, could not follow the
delicious African diction of our managers, just to give an
idea how special these occasions, how vast the field for
innovation and joyous interpretation…
25 August 2009
conjecture and expectant surmise at the
beautiful message emblazoned in golden
letters in my dairy: An NLS staff meeting at
ten thirty today
What joy awaits me, what wonderful things our
Chief Director will say, what delicious solecisms
and anecdotes to digest and new ideas to imbibe
how can I describe the field of infinite possibilities
that may be?
I shall take my music along, of course, listening to The
Merry Widow focuses my mind so that I hear more than
the others listening in cold blood; my book also, just in
case a quiet moment should present, I cannot endure
sitting in boredom for long
During the last meeting, Jane, the only English mother-
tongue speaker in the Department, could not follow the
delicious African diction of our managers, just to give an
idea how special these occasions, how vast the field for
innovation and joyous interpretation…
25 August 2009
One Line Of Thought
Mind swinging loose, could not concentrate
moorings lost , could not focus or interpret
reading a mystery, anchoring my thoughts
quieting the storm in my head, hating
total helplessness in confusion
Fatigue overwhelming, not continuously
conscious, helpful peace in Charles Berlitz
The Dragon’s Triangle where boats and planes
keep vanishing, maybe my subconscious sees
an analogy in mystery and lack of understanding
In a common phenomenon, processing new
experiences takes so much energy, mental
calm required to digest new information, this
feeling of peace, inner storm abating, feels
wonderful, whether able to work or not
Feeling better already more than I hoped for
before, happy with one line of thought unfolding
within total confusion…
Charles Berlitz “The Dragon’s Triangle”
Grafton Books 1990
25 August 2009
moorings lost , could not focus or interpret
reading a mystery, anchoring my thoughts
quieting the storm in my head, hating
total helplessness in confusion
Fatigue overwhelming, not continuously
conscious, helpful peace in Charles Berlitz
The Dragon’s Triangle where boats and planes
keep vanishing, maybe my subconscious sees
an analogy in mystery and lack of understanding
In a common phenomenon, processing new
experiences takes so much energy, mental
calm required to digest new information, this
feeling of peace, inner storm abating, feels
wonderful, whether able to work or not
Feeling better already more than I hoped for
before, happy with one line of thought unfolding
within total confusion…
Charles Berlitz “The Dragon’s Triangle”
Grafton Books 1990
25 August 2009
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Archiving Saturday 22 August
22 August 2009 Oh, lovely, lovely Saturday
got up, went to the shops, then a special treat
bought kitchen dishes, saw André Rieu, three
DVD’s in one kit, The 100 Greatest Moments
hubby complied and we bought it, watched it
Danced along with Zorba the Greek, loved
Barcarolle and the Second Waltz, Yackety
Sachs, I Will Follow Him from Sister Act; on
to the book Jane lent me - Leon Nacson on
Deepak Chopra, How To Live
In A World Of Infinite Possibilities, explaining
the superstition of materialism, ageing is a fal-
lacy overturned by fooling the brain with new
stimulation, the soul is an eternal observer out-
side the space-time continuum; afterwards I
had a choice between some DVD’s
Mars Attacks with Jack Nicholson and Glenn
Close, Peter Sellers in The Party which I can
watch in French; Joseph’s Amazing Techni-
colour Dreamcoat borrowed from June and
Hanlie; watched Webber’s Joseph again
enjoying the story, dancing to the music
I have started watching The Party; have to
while away the time until we can collect the
kids from school activities (venison feast with
contemporary music) they must bring home
soup for their dad - koeksisters (an original
Malaysian-South African delicacy) for me
Watching The Party while regarding my Deepak
Chopra notes, everything solid is transitory, thank
heaven, I would like to reach eternity, typing notes
for my diary and archiving them on the Internet…
got up, went to the shops, then a special treat
bought kitchen dishes, saw André Rieu, three
DVD’s in one kit, The 100 Greatest Moments
hubby complied and we bought it, watched it
Danced along with Zorba the Greek, loved
Barcarolle and the Second Waltz, Yackety
Sachs, I Will Follow Him from Sister Act; on
to the book Jane lent me - Leon Nacson on
Deepak Chopra, How To Live
In A World Of Infinite Possibilities, explaining
the superstition of materialism, ageing is a fal-
lacy overturned by fooling the brain with new
stimulation, the soul is an eternal observer out-
side the space-time continuum; afterwards I
had a choice between some DVD’s
Mars Attacks with Jack Nicholson and Glenn
Close, Peter Sellers in The Party which I can
watch in French; Joseph’s Amazing Techni-
colour Dreamcoat borrowed from June and
Hanlie; watched Webber’s Joseph again
enjoying the story, dancing to the music
I have started watching The Party; have to
while away the time until we can collect the
kids from school activities (venison feast with
contemporary music) they must bring home
soup for their dad - koeksisters (an original
Malaysian-South African delicacy) for me
Watching The Party while regarding my Deepak
Chopra notes, everything solid is transitory, thank
heaven, I would like to reach eternity, typing notes
for my diary and archiving them on the Internet…
Friday, August 21, 2009
Try Everything Everyone Recommends
I’ll try a pill, I’ll try a Migril, I’ll take Myprodyl
I’ll add Vaporub, I’ll take Simumax, add Sinuclear
I’ll try everything everyone recommends, I can’t
let my day end by falling asleep, Cinderella has
far to go to get to the end of today’s show
She needs to edit a visit by Congolese Police, look
at a new Pesticide document, she passed out in her
chair, she ate a waffle, it was not fair, it worsened
the dire situation, all will require an explanation for
her head falling so low, she cannot show
A list of words typed today, she cannot prove that
she exists, in a bid to make herself real, she read
messages on the Internet, it is forbidden, the know-
ledge should stay hidden, if the need for sleep would
pass, she could be a lady with class
If only she could concentrate, if only time would move
until it’s late and she could pick up kids from school
without falling asleep behind the steering wheel, if
only the rightful incumbent of her conscientious mind
would return, if this fatigue would leave
Maybe then she could move the mountain of work a
bit at a time – but with time standing still
it is not likely to happen today
Cinderella has far to go…
I’ll add Vaporub, I’ll take Simumax, add Sinuclear
I’ll try everything everyone recommends, I can’t
let my day end by falling asleep, Cinderella has
far to go to get to the end of today’s show
She needs to edit a visit by Congolese Police, look
at a new Pesticide document, she passed out in her
chair, she ate a waffle, it was not fair, it worsened
the dire situation, all will require an explanation for
her head falling so low, she cannot show
A list of words typed today, she cannot prove that
she exists, in a bid to make herself real, she read
messages on the Internet, it is forbidden, the know-
ledge should stay hidden, if the need for sleep would
pass, she could be a lady with class
If only she could concentrate, if only time would move
until it’s late and she could pick up kids from school
without falling asleep behind the steering wheel, if
only the rightful incumbent of her conscientious mind
would return, if this fatigue would leave
Maybe then she could move the mountain of work a
bit at a time – but with time standing still
it is not likely to happen today
Cinderella has far to go…
The Via Dolorosa Today
I cannot keep my eyes open, Jane
recommends magic potions, I would
be bankrupt if I tried everything, since
I cannot sit up, time has stopped, the
way time does whenever it knows we
cannot endure the pain of a situation
I am trying to concentrate while my
ears are folding in upon themselves
Jane and I are on the Via Dolorosa
today, time also warped her space
with mine, I only wake up while I
am writing a rhyme
As soon as I look at my document
about stormwater ditches, I go cross-
eyed, my brain tries to leave my skull
on a passing spaceship; so bored
with my own consciousness, I wish
somebody else will come
As the incumbent of my body, the
remote control boss should send a
being who likes editing, if left to me,
this job will never get done, I need
to sleep, I am falling asleep while
sitting upright
This is not right, but what can I do…
recommends magic potions, I would
be bankrupt if I tried everything, since
I cannot sit up, time has stopped, the
way time does whenever it knows we
cannot endure the pain of a situation
I am trying to concentrate while my
ears are folding in upon themselves
Jane and I are on the Via Dolorosa
today, time also warped her space
with mine, I only wake up while I
am writing a rhyme
As soon as I look at my document
about stormwater ditches, I go cross-
eyed, my brain tries to leave my skull
on a passing spaceship; so bored
with my own consciousness, I wish
somebody else will come
As the incumbent of my body, the
remote control boss should send a
being who likes editing, if left to me,
this job will never get done, I need
to sleep, I am falling asleep while
sitting upright
This is not right, but what can I do…
Thursday, August 20, 2009
They See Thankful Glares
Me and my brother, we’re simpatico,
like-minded in drinking, like-minded
in poetry, compatible in paying homage
to Bacchanalian feasts, we share the
genes of DNA strands that make us
seek joy in metaphysical songs and
humourous parley
My brother hates McGonagall but love
Yeats, I love Victor Hugo and Hopkins
as of late I hate McGonagall also, he
created an atrocious limerick on the battle
of David against Goliath, since I am David
while the empire was Goliath who attacked
me living peacefully in my country
Willam Topaz McStupidall sang the praises
of the bully killing my kin in military rhymes
with love-beaming eyes that have poets say
they see thankful glares, I find that detestable
and join my brother when he descries
weirdos with stupid rhymes…
like-minded in drinking, like-minded
in poetry, compatible in paying homage
to Bacchanalian feasts, we share the
genes of DNA strands that make us
seek joy in metaphysical songs and
humourous parley
My brother hates McGonagall but love
Yeats, I love Victor Hugo and Hopkins
as of late I hate McGonagall also, he
created an atrocious limerick on the battle
of David against Goliath, since I am David
while the empire was Goliath who attacked
me living peacefully in my country
Willam Topaz McStupidall sang the praises
of the bully killing my kin in military rhymes
with love-beaming eyes that have poets say
they see thankful glares, I find that detestable
and join my brother when he descries
weirdos with stupid rhymes…
His Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat
A Quantum Mind Spans Space-Time
After watching Andrew Lloyd Webber’s
Joseph and his Amazing Technicolour
Dreamcoat, I realized that Jospeh cried
because he was glad his youngest brother
Benjamin and father had not died and his
brothers had changed
They had changed so much, where before
they sold Joseph into slavery, green with
envy about his dreams and technicolour coat
now they were willing to lay down their lives
for love of their father and his favourite, the
youngest brother Benjamin
The blood ties and tribesmen love of family
must have tugged at Joseph’s heartstrings
and Joseph’s impeccable integrity, making
him refuse sharing free love with Potifar’s
wife, and his gift of dreams enabling him
to save all Egypt and the Faro’s kingdom
Marked him a sensitive person, I share his
passion for crying to relieve the pressure in
my heart, I share his feeling of estrangement
from the family of my birth, my brothers are dis-
persed, my twin sister is not accessible and
so many things went wrong in our house
My heart always rejoices with allegories hidden
in ancient tales, Andrew Lloyd Webber’s songs
revived my joy in ancient Bible history while the
Bible Code research sets my heart aflame with
expectation about the quantum nature of our
relativist universe marked by the signs of
An outside super-consciousness, a quantum
mind that spans space-time…
**********************************************
Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber “Joseph and his
Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat” with Donny Osmond
Maria Friedman, Richard Attenborough and Joan Collins
Jeffrey Satinover “The Truth Behind the Bible Code”
After watching Andrew Lloyd Webber’s
Joseph and his Amazing Technicolour
Dreamcoat, I realized that Jospeh cried
because he was glad his youngest brother
Benjamin and father had not died and his
brothers had changed
They had changed so much, where before
they sold Joseph into slavery, green with
envy about his dreams and technicolour coat
now they were willing to lay down their lives
for love of their father and his favourite, the
youngest brother Benjamin
The blood ties and tribesmen love of family
must have tugged at Joseph’s heartstrings
and Joseph’s impeccable integrity, making
him refuse sharing free love with Potifar’s
wife, and his gift of dreams enabling him
to save all Egypt and the Faro’s kingdom
Marked him a sensitive person, I share his
passion for crying to relieve the pressure in
my heart, I share his feeling of estrangement
from the family of my birth, my brothers are dis-
persed, my twin sister is not accessible and
so many things went wrong in our house
My heart always rejoices with allegories hidden
in ancient tales, Andrew Lloyd Webber’s songs
revived my joy in ancient Bible history while the
Bible Code research sets my heart aflame with
expectation about the quantum nature of our
relativist universe marked by the signs of
An outside super-consciousness, a quantum
mind that spans space-time…
**********************************************
Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber “Joseph and his
Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat” with Donny Osmond
Maria Friedman, Richard Attenborough and Joan Collins
Jeffrey Satinover “The Truth Behind the Bible Code”
Release The Little Alien
Puritanism - a haunting fear
someone might be happy when
we should live unhappy lives
Atoning for the sin of spirit falling
into physical existence through
sinful conception
Warped my youth into guilt and fear
Abraham’s website is the antidote
reality is inter-subjective consensus
We are free to create joy just as we
created all the repressive systems
in existence
Freedom to choose the best-feeling
thoughts is founded upon respect
for all other choices
From a smorgasbord of ideas while
ignoring things we dislike without
blowing them up
*****************
We all live on islands
role-players finding their
own preferred settings
writing their own scripts
choosing their own scenery
the music and atmosphere
existing within their own
imagination
A most wonderful
experience is to choose
to be joyous and elated
interested and
stimulated
History science philosophy
and religion teaches original
thinking holds more joy than
old stale thoughts
*******************
A cynic in my youth I discover
innocence late in life – joy of
appreciating self and others
in this benevolent universe
Joy of devotion to a self-chosen
goal and ecstasy of energy – I am
impervious to ennui of the blasé
I release The Little Alien
Living in my head to lead
in a great adventure of consciousness
character overcoming challenges
discovering glorious sensations
Sensation of being deliciously alive
an experience I will not exchange
for all the riches under the sun!
someone might be happy when
we should live unhappy lives
Atoning for the sin of spirit falling
into physical existence through
sinful conception
Warped my youth into guilt and fear
Abraham’s website is the antidote
reality is inter-subjective consensus
We are free to create joy just as we
created all the repressive systems
in existence
Freedom to choose the best-feeling
thoughts is founded upon respect
for all other choices
From a smorgasbord of ideas while
ignoring things we dislike without
blowing them up
*****************
We all live on islands
role-players finding their
own preferred settings
writing their own scripts
choosing their own scenery
the music and atmosphere
existing within their own
imagination
A most wonderful
experience is to choose
to be joyous and elated
interested and
stimulated
History science philosophy
and religion teaches original
thinking holds more joy than
old stale thoughts
*******************
A cynic in my youth I discover
innocence late in life – joy of
appreciating self and others
in this benevolent universe
Joy of devotion to a self-chosen
goal and ecstasy of energy – I am
impervious to ennui of the blasé
I release The Little Alien
Living in my head to lead
in a great adventure of consciousness
character overcoming challenges
discovering glorious sensations
Sensation of being deliciously alive
an experience I will not exchange
for all the riches under the sun!
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
A Blanket Of Golden Light
Jumped up this morning, 3 degrees Celsius, happily
plucked the kids out of bed, danced through the house,
prepared their oatmeal, felt on top of the world, the sun
throwing a blanket of golden light over everything,
becoming ever more beautiful, gave my heroine a
wonderful adventure followed by perfect tranquillity
Rocked up at work, sank down in my chair – and felt too
tired to move – what a let-down after such a great start!
Jane immediately recommended I remain calm and neutral
and not use up my energy early in the morning – but I cannot
live in such a boring way, staying neutral is artificial and
unnatural and makes me feel depressed
Without the “high” that comes before; I pay the price willingly
since I can confess on paper I feel fatigued after an adrenaline-
high start to the day, it is not too bad; and I could not leave my
poor heroine without challenge and excitement, her story is
the best part of the day!
20 August 2009
plucked the kids out of bed, danced through the house,
prepared their oatmeal, felt on top of the world, the sun
throwing a blanket of golden light over everything,
becoming ever more beautiful, gave my heroine a
wonderful adventure followed by perfect tranquillity
Rocked up at work, sank down in my chair – and felt too
tired to move – what a let-down after such a great start!
Jane immediately recommended I remain calm and neutral
and not use up my energy early in the morning – but I cannot
live in such a boring way, staying neutral is artificial and
unnatural and makes me feel depressed
Without the “high” that comes before; I pay the price willingly
since I can confess on paper I feel fatigued after an adrenaline-
high start to the day, it is not too bad; and I could not leave my
poor heroine without challenge and excitement, her story is
the best part of the day!
20 August 2009
The Population Out There Olé!
After reading the Three Faces of Eve last night
a case study written by two psychiatrists with
very suspicious surnames, Thigpen makes me
think of animal husbandry – pigpens no less –
and Cleckley reminds one of clucking chooks
I wondered about the Little Alien living in my head
always hanging on the rafters when I get scared
and refusing to type a translation until I give him
leave to type in comments, then having to purge
the text afterwards, I used to think
It was a device my mind devised to force me to
write other things besides boring translations
today my sister sent me a delightful rhyme, showing
that playing with words is in our blood - thus far the
Little Alien stays in my head and never comes out
Never claims a separate identity, simply pushes the
buttons controlling my brain without my consent
which gives rise to the question – who am I and
who is in charge of whom - my brain is a shared
entity, some consciousness with remote control
Decides how able and capable I shall be, maybe
I am just one part of a larger Gestalt with a long-
term mission on planet Earth and little me are
stuck with the consequences of never getting to
know the remote control boss very well
Last night I was depressed after reading of Eve
White’s dilemmas stuck with three personalities
but this morning I am as happy as a lark, her case
study affords so much scope for my imagination
working out what is going on in myself
Not even mentioning what must be going on in
the rest of the population out there, olé!
Thigpen and Cleckley “The Three Faces of Eve”
a case study written by two psychiatrists with
very suspicious surnames, Thigpen makes me
think of animal husbandry – pigpens no less –
and Cleckley reminds one of clucking chooks
I wondered about the Little Alien living in my head
always hanging on the rafters when I get scared
and refusing to type a translation until I give him
leave to type in comments, then having to purge
the text afterwards, I used to think
It was a device my mind devised to force me to
write other things besides boring translations
today my sister sent me a delightful rhyme, showing
that playing with words is in our blood - thus far the
Little Alien stays in my head and never comes out
Never claims a separate identity, simply pushes the
buttons controlling my brain without my consent
which gives rise to the question – who am I and
who is in charge of whom - my brain is a shared
entity, some consciousness with remote control
Decides how able and capable I shall be, maybe
I am just one part of a larger Gestalt with a long-
term mission on planet Earth and little me are
stuck with the consequences of never getting to
know the remote control boss very well
Last night I was depressed after reading of Eve
White’s dilemmas stuck with three personalities
but this morning I am as happy as a lark, her case
study affords so much scope for my imagination
working out what is going on in myself
Not even mentioning what must be going on in
the rest of the population out there, olé!
Thigpen and Cleckley “The Three Faces of Eve”
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Admitting I Am A Worm
Now what am I supposed to do?
My spiritual book indicates that the
spirit will always revert to its natural
state, we can treat the body for pains
and aches, but it will just create another
problem according to the mental situation
I grew up as a strict puritan Calvinist
indicted of sin for the evil deed of being
born, caught in a never-ending circle of guilt
no good deed means anything, integrity useless
just crying and admitting that I am a worm and
adulating a Saviour on my knees can save me
From eternal damnation, looks like my soul always
creates headaches and pains to prepare for eternal
suffering, as soon as one pain has been annihilated
the next pain starts up, now the abscess has been
fixed, my allergy is growing worse – always some
problem somewhere and it drives me nuts!
What am I supposed to do as the headache makes
me miserable? I do not even want to fight with anyone
and that is terrible, a bit of an argument is so exciting
and here I am with depression because my head is
too heavy for my neck, all my evil thoughts and nasty
remarks are probably creating this karma for me
And I HATE it!
My spiritual book indicates that the
spirit will always revert to its natural
state, we can treat the body for pains
and aches, but it will just create another
problem according to the mental situation
I grew up as a strict puritan Calvinist
indicted of sin for the evil deed of being
born, caught in a never-ending circle of guilt
no good deed means anything, integrity useless
just crying and admitting that I am a worm and
adulating a Saviour on my knees can save me
From eternal damnation, looks like my soul always
creates headaches and pains to prepare for eternal
suffering, as soon as one pain has been annihilated
the next pain starts up, now the abscess has been
fixed, my allergy is growing worse – always some
problem somewhere and it drives me nuts!
What am I supposed to do as the headache makes
me miserable? I do not even want to fight with anyone
and that is terrible, a bit of an argument is so exciting
and here I am with depression because my head is
too heavy for my neck, all my evil thoughts and nasty
remarks are probably creating this karma for me
And I HATE it!
Monday, August 17, 2009
Freedom In Spiritual Matters
Now I sing the Lord’s song in a strange land
a song of modern Israel, triumph divine in
four wars, terrorist attacks survived, 1973
Yom Kippur War, tanks in Syrian armada
surrendering without a fight
Israeli tank commando in a mine field, a
prayer, an unprecedented wind, sand blown
away, showing mines in their thousands, all
made a safe escape In the War of
Independence
A Jordanian battalion arriving at Mount Zion where
unarmed Israeli soldiers were stationed, suddenly
shouted ‘Abraham’ and ran away; thirty-six
Holocaust survivors passed Egyptian
soldiers without being seen…
The miracles and wonders done by G’d in no way
invalidates the mandate of other nation states to
follow their own revelation of deity, Israel has right
of place amongst everybody, attempts to wipe
them off the earth lead to intervention
By universal consciousness which respects all life
Israel must fulfill its role within the colourful mosaic
of humanity, Israel respects and protects the right
to life of every other culture, showing the highest
example of integrity
In devotion to ensuring the survival of an ancient
document of immense value for human science,
quantum mechanics explains that everybody
has right of way, caretakers of ancient
documents as well as agnostics
And devoted Muslims, the only requirement is
mutual respect and acceptance, allowing total
freedom in spiritual matters, following a chosen
creed loyally without forcing beliefs on anyone,
realizing diversity in all matters spiritual
Is as creative as diversity in nature and different
human cultures, letting go of the dream to be
supreme, realizing visions of freedom and
respect instead…
http://www.watchmanbiblestudy.com/Documents/IsraeliMiraclesGod.htm
God's Hand In Israel's History
God's hand has been on Israel since she became
a nation again. Against All Odds Israel Survives -
The Search for Miracles in Israel’s Wars $59.95
a song of modern Israel, triumph divine in
four wars, terrorist attacks survived, 1973
Yom Kippur War, tanks in Syrian armada
surrendering without a fight
Israeli tank commando in a mine field, a
prayer, an unprecedented wind, sand blown
away, showing mines in their thousands, all
made a safe escape In the War of
Independence
A Jordanian battalion arriving at Mount Zion where
unarmed Israeli soldiers were stationed, suddenly
shouted ‘Abraham’ and ran away; thirty-six
Holocaust survivors passed Egyptian
soldiers without being seen…
The miracles and wonders done by G’d in no way
invalidates the mandate of other nation states to
follow their own revelation of deity, Israel has right
of place amongst everybody, attempts to wipe
them off the earth lead to intervention
By universal consciousness which respects all life
Israel must fulfill its role within the colourful mosaic
of humanity, Israel respects and protects the right
to life of every other culture, showing the highest
example of integrity
In devotion to ensuring the survival of an ancient
document of immense value for human science,
quantum mechanics explains that everybody
has right of way, caretakers of ancient
documents as well as agnostics
And devoted Muslims, the only requirement is
mutual respect and acceptance, allowing total
freedom in spiritual matters, following a chosen
creed loyally without forcing beliefs on anyone,
realizing diversity in all matters spiritual
Is as creative as diversity in nature and different
human cultures, letting go of the dream to be
supreme, realizing visions of freedom and
respect instead…
http://www.watchmanbiblestudy.com/Documents/IsraeliMiraclesGod.htm
God's Hand In Israel's History
God's hand has been on Israel since she became
a nation again. Against All Odds Israel Survives -
The Search for Miracles in Israel’s Wars $59.95
Mediator Between Me And Reality
When the world appears absurd, words
losing all their meaning, when life mimics
a senseless comic strip, when there is no
motivation to be dredged up from the depths
of your being
When the local game of Monopoly seems like
a futile play, when the only thing holding life
together is pride, being too ashamed to hide
from the demands of reality while totally unable
to do your duty
It is time to seek spiritual help, create a fantasy
make up a new story for your life and hope your
body will be fooled to obey the demands of routine
life; I believe in so many things, yet when I fall
into the abyss
Yawning in my mind, when my identity is swallowed
and all things hallowed seem like dross and waste
when I cannot talk to anyone because the channel
has been firmly closed, I die in silence, do my best
to hide the dark
That grows inside, please let me find someone who
understands and brings back colour and meaning
into my life, please let me communicate directly
because there is no mediator between me and
reality…
losing all their meaning, when life mimics
a senseless comic strip, when there is no
motivation to be dredged up from the depths
of your being
When the local game of Monopoly seems like
a futile play, when the only thing holding life
together is pride, being too ashamed to hide
from the demands of reality while totally unable
to do your duty
It is time to seek spiritual help, create a fantasy
make up a new story for your life and hope your
body will be fooled to obey the demands of routine
life; I believe in so many things, yet when I fall
into the abyss
Yawning in my mind, when my identity is swallowed
and all things hallowed seem like dross and waste
when I cannot talk to anyone because the channel
has been firmly closed, I die in silence, do my best
to hide the dark
That grows inside, please let me find someone who
understands and brings back colour and meaning
into my life, please let me communicate directly
because there is no mediator between me and
reality…
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Dad’s Wondering Childhood Eyes
I regress when I am with my dad, start
to talk and act like a three-year old, when
going to the shops with him I want every
toy I see, everything in the shop windows
suddenly looks wonderful, every angel
looks more saintly, every fairy more exotic
shiny plastic beads and coloured Alice
bands appear irresistible again, colouring
pencils and notebooks exude an indes-
cribable charm, his presence changes
the shops into Aladdin’s caves, full of
miracles and wonders, I keep looking
for a doll to become my best friend, a
train set with which to make imaginary
voyages
When dad with his wondering childhood
eyes looks upon the big, wonderful world
his sense of joy and strange innocence
is quite delightful, when I say goodbye
and return home again, this three-year old
me is put to bed and left to rest out of sight
until I see my dad again – it is a miracle to
still have my dad aged eighty-one, I shall
send a letter to him mentioning how I ap-
preciate his presence in my life, allowing
me to re-experience my childhood every time
we meet; no wonder it is so difficult re-
lating to him in a group where I am playing
a grown-up role while underneath my three-
year old soul is seething!
17 August 2009
to talk and act like a three-year old, when
going to the shops with him I want every
toy I see, everything in the shop windows
suddenly looks wonderful, every angel
looks more saintly, every fairy more exotic
shiny plastic beads and coloured Alice
bands appear irresistible again, colouring
pencils and notebooks exude an indes-
cribable charm, his presence changes
the shops into Aladdin’s caves, full of
miracles and wonders, I keep looking
for a doll to become my best friend, a
train set with which to make imaginary
voyages
When dad with his wondering childhood
eyes looks upon the big, wonderful world
his sense of joy and strange innocence
is quite delightful, when I say goodbye
and return home again, this three-year old
me is put to bed and left to rest out of sight
until I see my dad again – it is a miracle to
still have my dad aged eighty-one, I shall
send a letter to him mentioning how I ap-
preciate his presence in my life, allowing
me to re-experience my childhood every time
we meet; no wonder it is so difficult re-
lating to him in a group where I am playing
a grown-up role while underneath my three-
year old soul is seething!
17 August 2009
Leave To Cry
I love speed, charging down the highway in a
fast car, switching on automatic speed control
and sitting back while the car drives itself, the
moment when the car is pulled forwards by a
supernatural force, feels as if the devil himself
propels the car, exhilarating sensation, scary at
first , my foot hovering around the brake all the
time, worried that I would miss my cue to slack
off, the excitement gorgeous
More time to reflect on what is said on the radio,
a church service broadcast that flabbergasts, the
minister harps on how loud Joseph cried in the
Pharaoh’s palace when his father and nasty brothers
appeared, his servants and others overheard his
cries though outside the room, I am intrigued, I
like crying when overwrought - but I do it quietly
camouflaging muffled sobs, washing dishes, in
front of my computer
Which I call Fridolin in tribute to my friend Heike, a
German who shocked me by confessing she hated
my referring to Oompah songs and October Feasts –
I always say my red eyes are caused by a hayfever
attack - how on earth did a MAN, masculine, Joseph
of the Bible, so exciting Potiphar’s wife tried to seduce
him; cry so loud that he was heard all through the palace?
I surmise he was actually crying about all the times hard-
ship followed his dutiful endeavours
First his brothers sold him into slavery when all he did
was posing in his many-coloured coat, recounting glorious
dreams; elevated to serving Potifar in Egypt, the evil wife
had him indicted for indecency as he refused to seduce her;
failure indeed, in prison he was forgotten by those he helped
until Faro had disturbing dreams, Joseph was called upon to
sightseer the truth therein; aha, that must be the reason for his
sobbing uncontrollably, he could not have missed his scheming
brothers all that much, nor his kind, but doodling father
Who worked fourteen years to woo his mother Rachel, after older
Leah was forced upon him - hang on, there is something strange
in the whole equation, maybe his parentage indicates he was weird
or stranger still, maybe the Bible Code dictates the telling
of the tale? I do not care either way, just glad the minister
has such a lot to say about Joseph crying so, giving me leave
to cry at work - or washing dishes…
fast car, switching on automatic speed control
and sitting back while the car drives itself, the
moment when the car is pulled forwards by a
supernatural force, feels as if the devil himself
propels the car, exhilarating sensation, scary at
first , my foot hovering around the brake all the
time, worried that I would miss my cue to slack
off, the excitement gorgeous
More time to reflect on what is said on the radio,
a church service broadcast that flabbergasts, the
minister harps on how loud Joseph cried in the
Pharaoh’s palace when his father and nasty brothers
appeared, his servants and others overheard his
cries though outside the room, I am intrigued, I
like crying when overwrought - but I do it quietly
camouflaging muffled sobs, washing dishes, in
front of my computer
Which I call Fridolin in tribute to my friend Heike, a
German who shocked me by confessing she hated
my referring to Oompah songs and October Feasts –
I always say my red eyes are caused by a hayfever
attack - how on earth did a MAN, masculine, Joseph
of the Bible, so exciting Potiphar’s wife tried to seduce
him; cry so loud that he was heard all through the palace?
I surmise he was actually crying about all the times hard-
ship followed his dutiful endeavours
First his brothers sold him into slavery when all he did
was posing in his many-coloured coat, recounting glorious
dreams; elevated to serving Potifar in Egypt, the evil wife
had him indicted for indecency as he refused to seduce her;
failure indeed, in prison he was forgotten by those he helped
until Faro had disturbing dreams, Joseph was called upon to
sightseer the truth therein; aha, that must be the reason for his
sobbing uncontrollably, he could not have missed his scheming
brothers all that much, nor his kind, but doodling father
Who worked fourteen years to woo his mother Rachel, after older
Leah was forced upon him - hang on, there is something strange
in the whole equation, maybe his parentage indicates he was weird
or stranger still, maybe the Bible Code dictates the telling
of the tale? I do not care either way, just glad the minister
has such a lot to say about Joseph crying so, giving me leave
to cry at work - or washing dishes…
I Wish I Were A Melody
16 August 2009 – Fell into the fallacy again
reiterating the wonderful phrase that anything
we want, we can have, feeling empowered and
strong after listening to André Rieu, Live in
Maastricht, the orchestra playing Olé Guapa,
a tango, an accomplished accordionist leading
My sister and I singing along with the flowing parts
ecstasy in being rhythmically alive, in becoming part
of the song, voices vibrating in unison, the joyous at-
mosphere, hearts burning in delight, then falling back
into reality, hunger and dinner, feeling fine for a time
until my allergic system reacts in debilitating headache
Teaching me although André Rieu awakens my desire
to sing in choirs and groups, the allergy ties me to the
life of a recluse, only following strict routines and never
required to perform in public, can I live with my disability
I am convinced that enforced isolation is advantageous
keeps me focused on a spiritual quest
For the meaning of life, but I prefer singing to almost
anything else, though reading and writing are wonderful,
I want to become a song, I wish I were a melody, a sequence
of nostalgic notes in minor tones delighting my soul…
reiterating the wonderful phrase that anything
we want, we can have, feeling empowered and
strong after listening to André Rieu, Live in
Maastricht, the orchestra playing Olé Guapa,
a tango, an accomplished accordionist leading
My sister and I singing along with the flowing parts
ecstasy in being rhythmically alive, in becoming part
of the song, voices vibrating in unison, the joyous at-
mosphere, hearts burning in delight, then falling back
into reality, hunger and dinner, feeling fine for a time
until my allergic system reacts in debilitating headache
Teaching me although André Rieu awakens my desire
to sing in choirs and groups, the allergy ties me to the
life of a recluse, only following strict routines and never
required to perform in public, can I live with my disability
I am convinced that enforced isolation is advantageous
keeps me focused on a spiritual quest
For the meaning of life, but I prefer singing to almost
anything else, though reading and writing are wonderful,
I want to become a song, I wish I were a melody, a sequence
of nostalgic notes in minor tones delighting my soul…
The Rebbe’s Midrashic Miracle Missiles
In August 1990, Saddam Hussein, threatening to
burn Israel with chemical warheads, marched
his men into Kuwait
All nations reacted with fear, but the Rebbe spread
a message of confidence, quoting an ancient
Midrashic passage foretelling
Unfolding events – When the Moshiach is revealed,
kings will provoke one another, nations will be in
turmoil, Israel will cry
Where shall we go, what shall we do, and G-d will
say - I did all for your sake, do not fear, the time
of your redemption is near
The Rebbe declared Israel to be the safest place, said
gas-masks would prove unnecessary, the war would
be over by Purim
As SCUD missiles with 600 pounds of explosives
fell on Tel Aviv, citizens listened in disbelief to
broadcasted newsreels
Crowded buildings were hit, yet not no-one was harmed,
on the traditional day of merry-making for Queen Esther
saving the nation, known as Purim
The war was officially over - the media paid little attention
to these miraculous events - the Rebbe said, but WE must
publicize G-d’s miraculous deeds…
http://www.chabad.org/therebbe/timeline_cdo/aid/62184/jewish/1991-Missiles-Miracles.htm
Chabad.org » The Rebbe » Life » Timeline Biography »
1991: Missiles & Miracles
In January 1991, my mother was in Israel, staying with
a family in Jerusalem. I never took note of the miraculous
nature of their escape from disaster; only when I read the
facts of what transpired at the time, did I realize the full
extent of the marvelous events. Quantum mechanics
offers an explanation for the fact that ALL faith in
goodness and ALL religion is blessed when followed
with integrity and I rejoice with everybody who
experiences miracles.
burn Israel with chemical warheads, marched
his men into Kuwait
All nations reacted with fear, but the Rebbe spread
a message of confidence, quoting an ancient
Midrashic passage foretelling
Unfolding events – When the Moshiach is revealed,
kings will provoke one another, nations will be in
turmoil, Israel will cry
Where shall we go, what shall we do, and G-d will
say - I did all for your sake, do not fear, the time
of your redemption is near
The Rebbe declared Israel to be the safest place, said
gas-masks would prove unnecessary, the war would
be over by Purim
As SCUD missiles with 600 pounds of explosives
fell on Tel Aviv, citizens listened in disbelief to
broadcasted newsreels
Crowded buildings were hit, yet not no-one was harmed,
on the traditional day of merry-making for Queen Esther
saving the nation, known as Purim
The war was officially over - the media paid little attention
to these miraculous events - the Rebbe said, but WE must
publicize G-d’s miraculous deeds…
http://www.chabad.org/therebbe/timeline_cdo/aid/62184/jewish/1991-Missiles-Miracles.htm
Chabad.org » The Rebbe » Life » Timeline Biography »
1991: Missiles & Miracles
In January 1991, my mother was in Israel, staying with
a family in Jerusalem. I never took note of the miraculous
nature of their escape from disaster; only when I read the
facts of what transpired at the time, did I realize the full
extent of the marvelous events. Quantum mechanics
offers an explanation for the fact that ALL faith in
goodness and ALL religion is blessed when followed
with integrity and I rejoice with everybody who
experiences miracles.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Commemorate Queen Esther’s Date
Instructed not to use bomb shelters;
prepare safe room, seal with masking
tape in missile attack, gas masks until
all-clear – according to Isaiah: ‘Gather
in your chambers, shut your doors
hide until the wrath is past.’
(Isaiah 26:20)
West Bank missile strikes only injured,
no lives lost, two buildings destroyed
no-one killed, several missiles fell
into the sea, another blown off
course by strong wind
No damages from two missiles striking
Negev desert, two missiles fired
from Iraq just disappeared
A missile in building airshaft did not
explode; a lady in bed held safe by
a steel door frame when ceiling
collapsed in attack
November seasonal rains appeared on the
first day of war, 17 January, continued
six weeks with high winds, chemical
weapons could not be used with
winds blowing towards Iraq
Nowhere in Israel were any believers
touched by the attacks.
27 February - a national prayer day at
Jerusalem’s Great Synagogue; Prime
Minister Yitzhak Shamir and President
Chaim Herzog, on eve of Purim
28 February - Iraq agreed to UN cease-
fire on date commemorating Israel’s
deliverance from their enemies
through queen Esther’s
intervention
******************
http://www.benmelech.org/z-def/english/israel-bailey.htm
Miracles During the First Gulf War
Compiled by Roslyn Bailey from Israeli sources
The Gulf War lasted from January 17, 1991, to
February 28, 1991, about 6 weeks. A terrifying
experience for all Israelis, there were stories
about amazing deliverances and curious
"coincidences". The reader can decide
whether these were indeed miracles
or not, but most Israelis made up
their minds long ago.
Source / Copyright
Tract found in the Jaffa Gate coffee-shop in
Jerusalem. If you happen to know the address
of Roslyn Bailey, please send it to me. Thank you.
Publication
First publication: October 1999 - Updated:
Homepage (Italian) & Webmaster
Homepage Punti Cardinali - Anastrefo Blog Webmaster
prepare safe room, seal with masking
tape in missile attack, gas masks until
all-clear – according to Isaiah: ‘Gather
in your chambers, shut your doors
hide until the wrath is past.’
(Isaiah 26:20)
West Bank missile strikes only injured,
no lives lost, two buildings destroyed
no-one killed, several missiles fell
into the sea, another blown off
course by strong wind
No damages from two missiles striking
Negev desert, two missiles fired
from Iraq just disappeared
A missile in building airshaft did not
explode; a lady in bed held safe by
a steel door frame when ceiling
collapsed in attack
November seasonal rains appeared on the
first day of war, 17 January, continued
six weeks with high winds, chemical
weapons could not be used with
winds blowing towards Iraq
Nowhere in Israel were any believers
touched by the attacks.
27 February - a national prayer day at
Jerusalem’s Great Synagogue; Prime
Minister Yitzhak Shamir and President
Chaim Herzog, on eve of Purim
28 February - Iraq agreed to UN cease-
fire on date commemorating Israel’s
deliverance from their enemies
through queen Esther’s
intervention
******************
http://www.benmelech.org/z-def/english/israel-bailey.htm
Miracles During the First Gulf War
Compiled by Roslyn Bailey from Israeli sources
The Gulf War lasted from January 17, 1991, to
February 28, 1991, about 6 weeks. A terrifying
experience for all Israelis, there were stories
about amazing deliverances and curious
"coincidences". The reader can decide
whether these were indeed miracles
or not, but most Israelis made up
their minds long ago.
Source / Copyright
Tract found in the Jaffa Gate coffee-shop in
Jerusalem. If you happen to know the address
of Roslyn Bailey, please send it to me. Thank you.
Publication
First publication: October 1999 - Updated:
Homepage (Italian) & Webmaster
Homepage Punti Cardinali - Anastrefo Blog Webmaster
Friday, August 14, 2009
Fear Touching My Soul
Benedict of near-death-experience fame says
all human souls together form a mandala most
beautiful, I look in the mirror and sigh, obviously
it is meant symbolically because physically I do
not look good
Two black jerseys to keep out the cold, face round
eating too much, eyes shocked and swollen after
the allergy reaction today when my heart raced,
I nearly passed out, a cold Friday afternoon pre-
paring a meal
Fear touching my soul with cold fingers, on Monday
we have to compile production sheets, the source of
my biggest humiliation, the cause of fatigue and tears,
at least every occurrence shortens my earthly life
by ten years
The harder I try, the worse the pathetic result, the
bigger the pain of humiliation and shame, mentally
preparing accepting defeat, my spirit refuses to allow
victory; look, says my spirit, at school you mastered
accounting - it did NOTHING for me
In standard eight you did fine in mathematics and I still
could not play the piano in a competent way, you tried
to sing and made a mess of it – why should I support
you in anything? - I agree, I have messed up my
dreams, even my storybook hero is fading
I hope that Riddick or Brad Pitt will revive my imagination
and help me to construct my Doctor Serfontein again,
right now loneliness is too much to bear...
all human souls together form a mandala most
beautiful, I look in the mirror and sigh, obviously
it is meant symbolically because physically I do
not look good
Two black jerseys to keep out the cold, face round
eating too much, eyes shocked and swollen after
the allergy reaction today when my heart raced,
I nearly passed out, a cold Friday afternoon pre-
paring a meal
Fear touching my soul with cold fingers, on Monday
we have to compile production sheets, the source of
my biggest humiliation, the cause of fatigue and tears,
at least every occurrence shortens my earthly life
by ten years
The harder I try, the worse the pathetic result, the
bigger the pain of humiliation and shame, mentally
preparing accepting defeat, my spirit refuses to allow
victory; look, says my spirit, at school you mastered
accounting - it did NOTHING for me
In standard eight you did fine in mathematics and I still
could not play the piano in a competent way, you tried
to sing and made a mess of it – why should I support
you in anything? - I agree, I have messed up my
dreams, even my storybook hero is fading
I hope that Riddick or Brad Pitt will revive my imagination
and help me to construct my Doctor Serfontein again,
right now loneliness is too much to bear...
Jy Is Droomverlôre
Lamtietie, damtietie, slaap pikanini,
doe-doe my liefstetjie, die lentebloeisels
sluimer nou, sag suisend in hul droom,
donker bruin fonk’lend haar laggende oë,
vrolike onskuld haar grootste genoë, skertsend
loer sy na my, vrolik sing sy en bly, van ditjies
en datjies en wie weet watjies - sy was ‘n deel van
daardie somer, ek was ‘n eensaam digter dromer,
en skielik ontwaak uit sy lentedroom, pasop vir
die ou eikeboom, joegaai! So nou en dan gaan ek
en my vroutjie na die plek, dan sien ek weer my
nooi is vandag nog net so mooi, elke aand langs
die groen koringlande wag jy daar as die skaduwees
daal, as die maan deur die wolke vir ons loer, word
ons saam na ‘n paradys gevoer, haai, haai haai haai,
jy is droomverlôre, jy het diamante wat skitter, jy’t
al wat ‘n mens kan begeer, want jy het die pragtigste
ogies, klein liefling wat wil jy nog meer, bly jy by my,
beminde teer, dan bloei in my die somerliefde weer,
rosies fluister liefdesoentjies in verbloemde blomme-
taal, die sterretjies brand al die maan is al daar…
FAK Potpourri Deel III
doe-doe my liefstetjie, die lentebloeisels
sluimer nou, sag suisend in hul droom,
donker bruin fonk’lend haar laggende oë,
vrolike onskuld haar grootste genoë, skertsend
loer sy na my, vrolik sing sy en bly, van ditjies
en datjies en wie weet watjies - sy was ‘n deel van
daardie somer, ek was ‘n eensaam digter dromer,
en skielik ontwaak uit sy lentedroom, pasop vir
die ou eikeboom, joegaai! So nou en dan gaan ek
en my vroutjie na die plek, dan sien ek weer my
nooi is vandag nog net so mooi, elke aand langs
die groen koringlande wag jy daar as die skaduwees
daal, as die maan deur die wolke vir ons loer, word
ons saam na ‘n paradys gevoer, haai, haai haai haai,
jy is droomverlôre, jy het diamante wat skitter, jy’t
al wat ‘n mens kan begeer, want jy het die pragtigste
ogies, klein liefling wat wil jy nog meer, bly jy by my,
beminde teer, dan bloei in my die somerliefde weer,
rosies fluister liefdesoentjies in verbloemde blomme-
taal, die sterretjies brand al die maan is al daar…
FAK Potpourri Deel III
Colours Of Mozart’s Melodies
Brain music, Hanlie’s brain is tuned to play
Schubert’s Serenade and Beethoven’s Moonlight
Sonata, June’s brain is tuned to the military
precision of the Radetsky March
Hermien is tripping to the Pizzicato Polka
my mother is living life under the guidance
of Debussy’s Clair De Lune, my sister is
keeping tune with Andre Rieu
Martin is conducting Strauss’ Thunder and
Lighting Polka, while Jane is moving elegantly
to a stately minuet in her head, I live within
the sweet colours of Mozart’s melodies…
***************************************
Quote from: “Brain music”
New Scientist Article
Didier Grandjean at the University of Geneva
says that brain music might identify temporal
patterns in particular. "Melodies are a much
better way to build complex mental represen-
tations over time than anything the eye can do".
Dan Lloyd is also keen to explore the aesthetic
aspects of brain music. "It's not quite like
composed sound but it's not random either,
it's 'almost music'. My students are putting
it on their playlists."
Schubert’s Serenade and Beethoven’s Moonlight
Sonata, June’s brain is tuned to the military
precision of the Radetsky March
Hermien is tripping to the Pizzicato Polka
my mother is living life under the guidance
of Debussy’s Clair De Lune, my sister is
keeping tune with Andre Rieu
Martin is conducting Strauss’ Thunder and
Lighting Polka, while Jane is moving elegantly
to a stately minuet in her head, I live within
the sweet colours of Mozart’s melodies…
***************************************
Quote from: “Brain music”
New Scientist Article
Didier Grandjean at the University of Geneva
says that brain music might identify temporal
patterns in particular. "Melodies are a much
better way to build complex mental represen-
tations over time than anything the eye can do".
Dan Lloyd is also keen to explore the aesthetic
aspects of brain music. "It's not quite like
composed sound but it's not random either,
it's 'almost music'. My students are putting
it on their playlists."
Death Feels Like Explosions
Ignored previous records of agony
now I am losing Friday, no more
laughter and fun, no more jokes
and sarcastic remarks, no more
reading, typing, thinking,
left in delirium, mind
reeling
being the happy sufferer of allergy
certain foods blow my mind away
still I eat anything that comes
my way, too late to stop the
domino effect snowballing
once I have crossed my
tolerance threshold
now I have to pay because I did not
count the cost before I launched
myself into a frenzy of food
give me oil in my lamp, keep
me burning, burning, burning
I sang this morning, now I
am burning in shame
everybody is working while I am
breathing and staring and waiting
at least, I know what it feels
like to be dead, Wayne Dyer
says we should prepare for
death by imagining we are
dead already
I am extremely well-prepared, death
feels like explosions and blackness
and stupefaction and flabbergasted
frustration, irritation and total
incomprehension and boredom and
torpor and lassitude and makes
me wish for complete
annihilation of comprehension, a
total destruction of awareness...
now I am losing Friday, no more
laughter and fun, no more jokes
and sarcastic remarks, no more
reading, typing, thinking,
left in delirium, mind
reeling
being the happy sufferer of allergy
certain foods blow my mind away
still I eat anything that comes
my way, too late to stop the
domino effect snowballing
once I have crossed my
tolerance threshold
now I have to pay because I did not
count the cost before I launched
myself into a frenzy of food
give me oil in my lamp, keep
me burning, burning, burning
I sang this morning, now I
am burning in shame
everybody is working while I am
breathing and staring and waiting
at least, I know what it feels
like to be dead, Wayne Dyer
says we should prepare for
death by imagining we are
dead already
I am extremely well-prepared, death
feels like explosions and blackness
and stupefaction and flabbergasted
frustration, irritation and total
incomprehension and boredom and
torpor and lassitude and makes
me wish for complete
annihilation of comprehension, a
total destruction of awareness...
Sophistic Aphorism
Some great spirits, definitely poet laureates
in the making, even have the most fantastic
courteous decency and insight to promise with
prescience and shamanistic understanding of
the human psyche to look at the poems of their
adoring fans and commentators writing accolades
in obeisance – should time permit between their
writing more poems for our happy consumption.
Oh marvellous, we must have been tacitly prohibited
from reading new poems until we receive personal
invitations. Oh, grandiloquent poets extrapolating all
ramifications of their benevolent munificent invitations
usually introduced with the sublime greeting “Hi” which
bodes so well for refined diction and aplomb, mastery of
stylistics and heuristics assured, bien entendu, the
original demagogues of bright erudition, cleverly
exposing imbroglios and showcasing benchmark
sophistication of elegant sophism and
aphorism… yeah!
in the making, even have the most fantastic
courteous decency and insight to promise with
prescience and shamanistic understanding of
the human psyche to look at the poems of their
adoring fans and commentators writing accolades
in obeisance – should time permit between their
writing more poems for our happy consumption.
Oh marvellous, we must have been tacitly prohibited
from reading new poems until we receive personal
invitations. Oh, grandiloquent poets extrapolating all
ramifications of their benevolent munificent invitations
usually introduced with the sublime greeting “Hi” which
bodes so well for refined diction and aplomb, mastery of
stylistics and heuristics assured, bien entendu, the
original demagogues of bright erudition, cleverly
exposing imbroglios and showcasing benchmark
sophistication of elegant sophism and
aphorism… yeah!
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Winning In An Atrocious Way
Watching rugby with hubby on TV, not
interested as a matter of principle, he
never watches fairies with me, com-
mentators say they want to see
more tries, not kicking, to win
be that as it may
South Africans are always more penalized
than any other team, if we did not defend
so well, scored by kicking, we would not
have gone very far, however boring our
style, playing interesting rugby does
not bring victories
There should be TWO world cups, one for
the winning team – boring – and one for
the most interesting, England, Australia
New Zealand, France, South America -
the team with the most interesting
game plan should win
Cynical commentators crying Boring and
Foul all the time will come into their own, stop
trying to run down South Africans for being so
boring, that’s who we are, boring to you because
we keep winning in a most atrocious way, we learnt
only one thing in our existence
Fight to the end, outnumbered by those with no
integrity, let’s play and show them what integrity
is, we have always been fighting since every
combat on the international scene gave us a
chance to show we do not know
how to give up...
13 August 2009 20:08 South Africa
interested as a matter of principle, he
never watches fairies with me, com-
mentators say they want to see
more tries, not kicking, to win
be that as it may
South Africans are always more penalized
than any other team, if we did not defend
so well, scored by kicking, we would not
have gone very far, however boring our
style, playing interesting rugby does
not bring victories
There should be TWO world cups, one for
the winning team – boring – and one for
the most interesting, England, Australia
New Zealand, France, South America -
the team with the most interesting
game plan should win
Cynical commentators crying Boring and
Foul all the time will come into their own, stop
trying to run down South Africans for being so
boring, that’s who we are, boring to you because
we keep winning in a most atrocious way, we learnt
only one thing in our existence
Fight to the end, outnumbered by those with no
integrity, let’s play and show them what integrity
is, we have always been fighting since every
combat on the international scene gave us a
chance to show we do not know
how to give up...
13 August 2009 20:08 South Africa
A Sweet, Loving Atmosphere
A perfectly maneuvered military operation
executed with brilliant precision, hubby
helped Tiaan to make a paper cylinder
Nici did the cutting, prepared print-outs
I checked writing, all prepared dinner -
chicken, salad and vegetables
Somehow a sweet, loving atmosphere
pervading everything tonight, Tiaan
went off to read The Fountainhead
by Ayn Rand, he had finished Mila
XVIII by Leon Uris long ago, hubby
is smiling, Tiaan started playing
Water polo, Nici is playing baseball, the
kids often exercise on the apparatus in
the sun room which I carefully eschew,
after watching a sit-com, we find adver-
tisements the most riveting, especially
- did you know the monkey
stole my Savana – no, but if you hum it
I can play it - the barman says, playing
his ukulele, I sigh happily, sitting with
family in front of the TV…
Thursday 13 July 2009
executed with brilliant precision, hubby
helped Tiaan to make a paper cylinder
Nici did the cutting, prepared print-outs
I checked writing, all prepared dinner -
chicken, salad and vegetables
Somehow a sweet, loving atmosphere
pervading everything tonight, Tiaan
went off to read The Fountainhead
by Ayn Rand, he had finished Mila
XVIII by Leon Uris long ago, hubby
is smiling, Tiaan started playing
Water polo, Nici is playing baseball, the
kids often exercise on the apparatus in
the sun room which I carefully eschew,
after watching a sit-com, we find adver-
tisements the most riveting, especially
- did you know the monkey
stole my Savana – no, but if you hum it
I can play it - the barman says, playing
his ukulele, I sigh happily, sitting with
family in front of the TV…
Thursday 13 July 2009
Treasured Spiritual Upliftment
Remember how to use the power of the
imagination to remain exhilarated
I had better stop this translation or risk
losing the use of all my mental powers
I do not like pettiness and complaints,
people childishly indicting each other
This one breathes all my oxygen, there
is not enough for me and my children
That one drives a beautiful car, now the tax
payer has less to feed his own greediness
The poor receives too many benefits, such a
heavy burden for the overweight middle class
Mumble-grumble blah-blah, to add insult to
injury, I have to read their nasty words
Then convert their loveless ideas into other
words to spread the mental pestilence
People are as beautiful, irresponsible and
thoughtless as babies, as immoral, amoral
I love people through their words, see their
souls exposed, see their beauty ethereal
But I only retain treasured words of spiritual
upliftment in my heart, the rest I discard…
imagination to remain exhilarated
I had better stop this translation or risk
losing the use of all my mental powers
I do not like pettiness and complaints,
people childishly indicting each other
This one breathes all my oxygen, there
is not enough for me and my children
That one drives a beautiful car, now the tax
payer has less to feed his own greediness
The poor receives too many benefits, such a
heavy burden for the overweight middle class
Mumble-grumble blah-blah, to add insult to
injury, I have to read their nasty words
Then convert their loveless ideas into other
words to spread the mental pestilence
People are as beautiful, irresponsible and
thoughtless as babies, as immoral, amoral
I love people through their words, see their
souls exposed, see their beauty ethereal
But I only retain treasured words of spiritual
upliftment in my heart, the rest I discard…
I Am Happy And Free
Everything is truthful and valid
law of attraction lets everything
be; the question is not whether it
is right or wrong
The question simply is whether their
approach feels good to me, if it does
not, I can choose something else to
think on
Went to get medication at the pharmacy
came back with two chocolates and suddenly
my eyes are focusing, Vaporub lets me breathe
while I eat, the lesson for me
Chocolate is the best medicine, the approach
of dieticians does not feel good, as long as I
eat and drink what I like and read a text of
spiritual beauty, I am happy and free!
law of attraction lets everything
be; the question is not whether it
is right or wrong
The question simply is whether their
approach feels good to me, if it does
not, I can choose something else to
think on
Went to get medication at the pharmacy
came back with two chocolates and suddenly
my eyes are focusing, Vaporub lets me breathe
while I eat, the lesson for me
Chocolate is the best medicine, the approach
of dieticians does not feel good, as long as I
eat and drink what I like and read a text of
spiritual beauty, I am happy and free!
Translation by Machine If You Please
If it does not charm or satisfy
eliminate by turning all your
attention to your preferences
instead
Exploring problems prevents
the visualisation of pleasing
substitutes, vibrating in
another frequency
Focus on beautiful alternatives
to attract favourite pastimes to
you; oh dear, I wish for more
fun and song
Transmuting boring red lines
into boring versions in blue
is a most soul-destroying
activity
A joyless text recreated in
another language spreads
the pain of awareness to
new victims
The solution is translation
by machine if you please!
eliminate by turning all your
attention to your preferences
instead
Exploring problems prevents
the visualisation of pleasing
substitutes, vibrating in
another frequency
Focus on beautiful alternatives
to attract favourite pastimes to
you; oh dear, I wish for more
fun and song
Transmuting boring red lines
into boring versions in blue
is a most soul-destroying
activity
A joyless text recreated in
another language spreads
the pain of awareness to
new victims
The solution is translation
by machine if you please!
Wonderful Placebo Charm
A colleague in pain, offered a pill, she
swallowed one obligingly, feeling better
it seemed, decided to take one myself
made a ghastly discovery
The container is filled with small plastic
beads, laughing uproariously, just for
the hell of it took one myself, a most
perfect placebo
I punished myself for my carelessness
by taking the same medication I offered
another in blissful forgetfulness of the
beads I wanted to keep
She seems to be much better today
after laughing so much, I also feel
wonderful, maybe the placebo
effect worked a charm
For both of us!
swallowed one obligingly, feeling better
it seemed, decided to take one myself
made a ghastly discovery
The container is filled with small plastic
beads, laughing uproariously, just for
the hell of it took one myself, a most
perfect placebo
I punished myself for my carelessness
by taking the same medication I offered
another in blissful forgetfulness of the
beads I wanted to keep
She seems to be much better today
after laughing so much, I also feel
wonderful, maybe the placebo
effect worked a charm
For both of us!
Mandala Mushroom Archetype
Mellen-Thomas Benedict
a near-death experience
related in his book called
Journey Through the Light
Everything Hindu Judaist
Protestant Buddhist all of
them represents a facet of
the whole religions should
Let each other be live and
let live a different mosaic
forming a big picture all
important individually
I feared toxic waste nuclear
missiles deforestation the
population explosion now I
love every problem
I love the mushroom cloud the
holiest mandala we have made
to date an archetype that
brought us all together
A new level of consciousness
knowing we can blow up earth
fifty times or more we realize
we are all here together now
We said we do not need bombs
any more in a safer world than
we have ever been before
getting safer
Came back from my near-death
experience loving toxic waste it
brought us together a system
becoming aware
Earth domesticating itself populations
increasing to optimal energy range to
shift our consciousness changing
energy - politics - money
Transferring energy in this
powerful vortex we are
living in…
**************************************
http://www.mellen-thomas.com/stories.htm
Quotes from Near-Death Experience NDE Story
of Mellen-Thomas Benedict “Journey Through
the Light and Back” found on the Internet
a near-death experience
related in his book called
Journey Through the Light
Everything Hindu Judaist
Protestant Buddhist all of
them represents a facet of
the whole religions should
Let each other be live and
let live a different mosaic
forming a big picture all
important individually
I feared toxic waste nuclear
missiles deforestation the
population explosion now I
love every problem
I love the mushroom cloud the
holiest mandala we have made
to date an archetype that
brought us all together
A new level of consciousness
knowing we can blow up earth
fifty times or more we realize
we are all here together now
We said we do not need bombs
any more in a safer world than
we have ever been before
getting safer
Came back from my near-death
experience loving toxic waste it
brought us together a system
becoming aware
Earth domesticating itself populations
increasing to optimal energy range to
shift our consciousness changing
energy - politics - money
Transferring energy in this
powerful vortex we are
living in…
**************************************
http://www.mellen-thomas.com/stories.htm
Quotes from Near-Death Experience NDE Story
of Mellen-Thomas Benedict “Journey Through
the Light and Back” found on the Internet
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Pain Of Existence Exquisite
In the end the pain became too
much, I opted out, sweet release
of self-pity and doubt, the weight
compressing my heart lifted, recri-
mination and angst lost their hold,
the stiffening muscles in my throat
suffocating me relaxed slowly
The physical pain disappeared as
mental distress was calmed, I would
take cyanide or arsenic to take the pain
away, since medication holds sway, I
approve and enjoy what’s left of my
youth, last night I nearly died when
taking a fright for my heroine
The problem was solved; thank you
to the people who create the story, this
morning I had to face my own Nemesis,
the excruciating pain; tonight I have put
an end to the pain by sniffing out a part
of me, thank heaven, I will not continue
in so much pain
As children we all learnt what pain of
rejection and failure felt like, I refuse to
experience it again without help, any
drug would suffice, death would be wel-
comed, pain of existence exquisite, I
cannot deal with it most of the time…
much, I opted out, sweet release
of self-pity and doubt, the weight
compressing my heart lifted, recri-
mination and angst lost their hold,
the stiffening muscles in my throat
suffocating me relaxed slowly
The physical pain disappeared as
mental distress was calmed, I would
take cyanide or arsenic to take the pain
away, since medication holds sway, I
approve and enjoy what’s left of my
youth, last night I nearly died when
taking a fright for my heroine
The problem was solved; thank you
to the people who create the story, this
morning I had to face my own Nemesis,
the excruciating pain; tonight I have put
an end to the pain by sniffing out a part
of me, thank heaven, I will not continue
in so much pain
As children we all learnt what pain of
rejection and failure felt like, I refuse to
experience it again without help, any
drug would suffice, death would be wel-
comed, pain of existence exquisite, I
cannot deal with it most of the time…
Increase With Evidence
Outside a temperature of 26 degrees
Celsius, inside too hot to live, I cannot
keep awake, at night I cannot sleep
Then I cannot keep my eyes open at
the office, what Jane must think seeing
me drooping like this
I am probably the laziest person she has
ever known, if we do not go home very
soon I will betray myself
I am trying to find a magical formula to
keep me awake till it is time to leave,
please let me sleep
Just not here in the open-plan office;
everybody thinks I am so energetic,
a wonderful image
I am trying to increase with evidence…
Celsius, inside too hot to live, I cannot
keep awake, at night I cannot sleep
Then I cannot keep my eyes open at
the office, what Jane must think seeing
me drooping like this
I am probably the laziest person she has
ever known, if we do not go home very
soon I will betray myself
I am trying to find a magical formula to
keep me awake till it is time to leave,
please let me sleep
Just not here in the open-plan office;
everybody thinks I am so energetic,
a wonderful image
I am trying to increase with evidence…
Dissertation on Frustration
Closed Union Buildings gate, try next
entrance, guard stops me, for cars
only, other gate closed, I explain
he insists, I turn away, others
inside, how did they get in
Complained to Hanlie, that is discrimi-
nation, she facetiously replies, an
explanation for this day, unfair
others got in while I did not
make the grade
I laughed, feels like a conspiracy to me
I read portents in everything, when I
see positive things the game is fine
but if life seems negative, it
turns ugly because
There is no redress if unknown forces
determine the outcome, I decided to
state my case in a dissertation on
frustration…
entrance, guard stops me, for cars
only, other gate closed, I explain
he insists, I turn away, others
inside, how did they get in
Complained to Hanlie, that is discrimi-
nation, she facetiously replies, an
explanation for this day, unfair
others got in while I did not
make the grade
I laughed, feels like a conspiracy to me
I read portents in everything, when I
see positive things the game is fine
but if life seems negative, it
turns ugly because
There is no redress if unknown forces
determine the outcome, I decided to
state my case in a dissertation on
frustration…
Hide For The Rest Of My Life
My guru has this right, ‘Failure should
feel bad to you’ - failure after trying my
best to survive boredom at the behest
of my foolish ego, tastes like ashes and
coal, ‘Life is supposed to go well, when
it does not, things are going awry’
I understand what you mean, everything
is going wrong, but you claim the source of
the problem is in me, we have control when
we know who-we-are, know that we attract
what happens to us, the power of emotions
teaches us the value of joy in all we do
Given that I am a disaster of a poetaster who
only enjoys prosody, limericks and rhymes, a
spiritual seeker who believes in everybody’s
right to be different in a quantum universe of
probability; I should throw in the towel,
run for all that I am worth
Hide for the rest of my life - This is what my
emotions of boredom and depression
are telling me…
feel bad to you’ - failure after trying my
best to survive boredom at the behest
of my foolish ego, tastes like ashes and
coal, ‘Life is supposed to go well, when
it does not, things are going awry’
I understand what you mean, everything
is going wrong, but you claim the source of
the problem is in me, we have control when
we know who-we-are, know that we attract
what happens to us, the power of emotions
teaches us the value of joy in all we do
Given that I am a disaster of a poetaster who
only enjoys prosody, limericks and rhymes, a
spiritual seeker who believes in everybody’s
right to be different in a quantum universe of
probability; I should throw in the towel,
run for all that I am worth
Hide for the rest of my life - This is what my
emotions of boredom and depression
are telling me…
Telling Jokes, Sweeping Streets
My eternally optimistic guru blithely
claims achieving success is our na-
tural birthright, ay, there’s the rub, I
was born to be a successful tea-girl,
cleaner, singer and dreamer
I am the worst academic that has ever
been, therein lies my glory, the harder
I try the worse the result, the higher my
motivation, the greater the boredom
I am an example to others
How NOT to live your life, what dreams
to never cherish, not to think you can do
anything you wish, never try your best
when your natural proclivity is to play
the fool, telling jokes, sweeping streets
I was meant to stoke fires in Hades,
rowing lost spirits across the river Stix,
do hard manual labour, cross the famed
Drakenberg barefoot, dress stones in
prison, intone a repetitive song
While gathering mistletoe for a witches’
brew to give to the manically depressed,
to make inane remarks while washing
people’s feet, become an ill-fated court
jester, be a kamakazi soldier in some
Adventurous war…
claims achieving success is our na-
tural birthright, ay, there’s the rub, I
was born to be a successful tea-girl,
cleaner, singer and dreamer
I am the worst academic that has ever
been, therein lies my glory, the harder
I try the worse the result, the higher my
motivation, the greater the boredom
I am an example to others
How NOT to live your life, what dreams
to never cherish, not to think you can do
anything you wish, never try your best
when your natural proclivity is to play
the fool, telling jokes, sweeping streets
I was meant to stoke fires in Hades,
rowing lost spirits across the river Stix,
do hard manual labour, cross the famed
Drakenberg barefoot, dress stones in
prison, intone a repetitive song
While gathering mistletoe for a witches’
brew to give to the manically depressed,
to make inane remarks while washing
people’s feet, become an ill-fated court
jester, be a kamakazi soldier in some
Adventurous war…
Emotional Delinquency; Spiritual Absence
My translation returned, all my
idiotic mistakes looming too large
to be missed, all my idiocy in-
dicting me of stupidity, a curtain
closing the stage of my mind
Trying to force myself to learn
from my mistakes, the harder I
try, the worse the headache, it
becomes increasingly difficult
to concentrate
No control of my thoughts, looked
at today’s message, All Is Well,
feeling worse, clearly the wise
guru did not know of my turbulent
existence when
He posted these blissful words on
the internet, my eyes cannot see
the perfection he envisages, my
ears only register high-pitched
shrilling which I try to camouflage
By listening to music through my
earphones, took pills, my soul is
perturbed and nothing in my world
can calm it today, I read that in the
afterlife we shall know the soul
As pure awareness, right now it is
a lurking pest, destroying all my
attempts to be a dedicated incum-
bent inhabiting formal bureaucracy,
since the guru claims all is well
There is no danger in my emotional
delinquency and spiritual absence, I
am taking my mind on a trip round the
world to calm it down, inner turmoil
makes it impossible to realize
My dream of improvement, I must be
meant to remain ignorant for the rest
of my limited physical life, doomed to
eternal inability to progress
intellectually…
idiotic mistakes looming too large
to be missed, all my idiocy in-
dicting me of stupidity, a curtain
closing the stage of my mind
Trying to force myself to learn
from my mistakes, the harder I
try, the worse the headache, it
becomes increasingly difficult
to concentrate
No control of my thoughts, looked
at today’s message, All Is Well,
feeling worse, clearly the wise
guru did not know of my turbulent
existence when
He posted these blissful words on
the internet, my eyes cannot see
the perfection he envisages, my
ears only register high-pitched
shrilling which I try to camouflage
By listening to music through my
earphones, took pills, my soul is
perturbed and nothing in my world
can calm it today, I read that in the
afterlife we shall know the soul
As pure awareness, right now it is
a lurking pest, destroying all my
attempts to be a dedicated incum-
bent inhabiting formal bureaucracy,
since the guru claims all is well
There is no danger in my emotional
delinquency and spiritual absence, I
am taking my mind on a trip round the
world to calm it down, inner turmoil
makes it impossible to realize
My dream of improvement, I must be
meant to remain ignorant for the rest
of my limited physical life, doomed to
eternal inability to progress
intellectually…
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Perfect Brain-Dead Human Being
This is the ideal, I have changed
into a machine, staring ahead,
translating a steady stream of
little complaints of small-minded
people requesting regulations
against people walking dogs on
sidewalks and breeding birds
Mission accomplished, I am turning
into the perfect, mindless official
who does not expand her cons-
ciousness beyond her boring do-
cuments, the perfect brain-dead
human being with which the spirit
of the world can be killed, bit by bit
Initiative extinguished, no existential
feelings jumping up to spoil the rhythm
of fingers typing diligently, asking for
roads to be fixed, Mr President, criminal
records to be erased, a new start for
everyone; for this inanity I will receive
a goodly salary, but preparations for
Eternity will lead to my decline; this is
the dream society where we need not make
robots, we simply change people into
machines, it is the most comforting
experience, swaying to the sweet music
in my head while typing words that never
lived, all still-born, completely dead…
into a machine, staring ahead,
translating a steady stream of
little complaints of small-minded
people requesting regulations
against people walking dogs on
sidewalks and breeding birds
Mission accomplished, I am turning
into the perfect, mindless official
who does not expand her cons-
ciousness beyond her boring do-
cuments, the perfect brain-dead
human being with which the spirit
of the world can be killed, bit by bit
Initiative extinguished, no existential
feelings jumping up to spoil the rhythm
of fingers typing diligently, asking for
roads to be fixed, Mr President, criminal
records to be erased, a new start for
everyone; for this inanity I will receive
a goodly salary, but preparations for
Eternity will lead to my decline; this is
the dream society where we need not make
robots, we simply change people into
machines, it is the most comforting
experience, swaying to the sweet music
in my head while typing words that never
lived, all still-born, completely dead…
A Memory Stark And Bleak
A memory as stark and bleak in black and
grey as if it was yesterday, my mother
and I went to the station to meet my
father returning from the office
I felt totally lost in an empty space with
ominous threats everywhere, a promise of
death and decay in the air, nowhere
safe, nowhere to go
My father carried an old tape-recorder; they
fought, she was angry, through all the years
the terrible darkness of that day remained
in my mind, ready to jump out
When an association unlocks the memory -
but that tape-recorder became a miracle in
our lives, we recorded Liewe Heksie stories
to savour again and again
Humorous shows like ‘Stadig Oor Die Klippertjies’
and ‘Bog met Blou Maandag’, with Jan Salie and
his Van Helsdingen wife, my father recorded our
three year old voices complaining
Mummy refuses to let us bathe my baby brother, he
recorded mother playing piano, we recorded our
own radio disc jockey shows, interrupting the
songs with frequent comments
It is so strange that this miracle toy appeared
in such a terrible atmosphere - when I feel
lonely on a dark day, I can still replay that
day’s feeling of hopeless abandon
It must have been a reflection of my mother’s
fatigue and depression, I hope nobody else
ever feels that way…
grey as if it was yesterday, my mother
and I went to the station to meet my
father returning from the office
I felt totally lost in an empty space with
ominous threats everywhere, a promise of
death and decay in the air, nowhere
safe, nowhere to go
My father carried an old tape-recorder; they
fought, she was angry, through all the years
the terrible darkness of that day remained
in my mind, ready to jump out
When an association unlocks the memory -
but that tape-recorder became a miracle in
our lives, we recorded Liewe Heksie stories
to savour again and again
Humorous shows like ‘Stadig Oor Die Klippertjies’
and ‘Bog met Blou Maandag’, with Jan Salie and
his Van Helsdingen wife, my father recorded our
three year old voices complaining
Mummy refuses to let us bathe my baby brother, he
recorded mother playing piano, we recorded our
own radio disc jockey shows, interrupting the
songs with frequent comments
It is so strange that this miracle toy appeared
in such a terrible atmosphere - when I feel
lonely on a dark day, I can still replay that
day’s feeling of hopeless abandon
It must have been a reflection of my mother’s
fatigue and depression, I hope nobody else
ever feels that way…
Monday, August 10, 2009
Visions Growing More Remote
Headache and stomach cramps,
combating distress by focusing on
reassuring things, a roof over my head,
a warm bed, enough to eat, albeit I’m
allergic to wheat, excellent health
This is all good, but my emotions remain
deaf to this litany of happy thoughts, still
feeling ill, allergy affecting my mind, iso-
lating me from all I love, favourite books
and absorbing subjects
Only the feeling of pain reigns in my head,
fatigued but unable to sleep, a crisis without
end as medication fails, I am free to create my
own atmosphere, but my feelings remain un-
changed, I am stuck in a dark place
Where my handicap is stronger than hope,
my visions growing more remote with every
passing moment, my stomach rejecting the
combination of foodstuffs I consumed
today, I should have been more
Circumspect, no means to stop the mercury
dropping to the lowest level of depression, a
spiral of increasing physical unrest, my
defences break down as I sink under
the waves of growing distress
I am sinking, the pit seems endless,
too late to dream or think myself
out of this one...
combating distress by focusing on
reassuring things, a roof over my head,
a warm bed, enough to eat, albeit I’m
allergic to wheat, excellent health
This is all good, but my emotions remain
deaf to this litany of happy thoughts, still
feeling ill, allergy affecting my mind, iso-
lating me from all I love, favourite books
and absorbing subjects
Only the feeling of pain reigns in my head,
fatigued but unable to sleep, a crisis without
end as medication fails, I am free to create my
own atmosphere, but my feelings remain un-
changed, I am stuck in a dark place
Where my handicap is stronger than hope,
my visions growing more remote with every
passing moment, my stomach rejecting the
combination of foodstuffs I consumed
today, I should have been more
Circumspect, no means to stop the mercury
dropping to the lowest level of depression, a
spiral of increasing physical unrest, my
defences break down as I sink under
the waves of growing distress
I am sinking, the pit seems endless,
too late to dream or think myself
out of this one...
Music In My Mind
Brought work documents home, letters by
disgruntled dissidents, a Wu-chu Kung Fu
expert offering a show for the 2010
World Cup opening ceremony
Translated lines without rhythm or rhyme,
stopped when we went to the shops, side-
tracked into admiring a beautiful flowering
garden at a roadside nursery
Dreaming about Deepak Chopra’s depiction
of the afterlife where we get what we think
about; I visualise perfect love and complete
freedom without unmusical, discordant,
Toneless, grating noise; we sang Frère Jaques*
before we could talk, my father taped us, we
listened to the recording as we grew older,
a three-year old me singing
Hansie-Slim, berg wil klim, in die wye wêreld in*
before I learnt what the words meant; my brain
creates rhythmic patterns in musical delight,
causing me to produce
The most atrocious translations of the harsh words
other authors strung in cold lines without reference
to music and song; the ice-cold world of materialism
is where I belong - but
I am always listening to the music playing in my head
How Great Thou Art, Psallite Deo and Ay Marieke,
Marieke by Jacques Brel...
***************************************************
* Frère Jacques = Vader Jakob, slaap jy nog,
hoor hoe lui die kerkklok, ding-dong-del
[Frère Jacques, dormez-vous, sonnez les
matines, din-din-don]
FAK:
[*Hans ran off, mountaineering, hat and stick,
brave indeed; mother sighs, Hans is gone,
run back home anon ]
*Hansie-Slim, berg wil klim, in die wye wêreld in,
stok en hoed, pas hom goed, hy is vol van moed,
Maar die moerderhart is seer, Hans is in die huis
nie meer, hoor nou net, moeder sug, hardloop
gou-gou terug.
disgruntled dissidents, a Wu-chu Kung Fu
expert offering a show for the 2010
World Cup opening ceremony
Translated lines without rhythm or rhyme,
stopped when we went to the shops, side-
tracked into admiring a beautiful flowering
garden at a roadside nursery
Dreaming about Deepak Chopra’s depiction
of the afterlife where we get what we think
about; I visualise perfect love and complete
freedom without unmusical, discordant,
Toneless, grating noise; we sang Frère Jaques*
before we could talk, my father taped us, we
listened to the recording as we grew older,
a three-year old me singing
Hansie-Slim, berg wil klim, in die wye wêreld in*
before I learnt what the words meant; my brain
creates rhythmic patterns in musical delight,
causing me to produce
The most atrocious translations of the harsh words
other authors strung in cold lines without reference
to music and song; the ice-cold world of materialism
is where I belong - but
I am always listening to the music playing in my head
How Great Thou Art, Psallite Deo and Ay Marieke,
Marieke by Jacques Brel...
***************************************************
* Frère Jacques = Vader Jakob, slaap jy nog,
hoor hoe lui die kerkklok, ding-dong-del
[Frère Jacques, dormez-vous, sonnez les
matines, din-din-don]
FAK:
[*Hans ran off, mountaineering, hat and stick,
brave indeed; mother sighs, Hans is gone,
run back home anon ]
*Hansie-Slim, berg wil klim, in die wye wêreld in,
stok en hoed, pas hom goed, hy is vol van moed,
Maar die moerderhart is seer, Hans is in die huis
nie meer, hoor nou net, moeder sug, hardloop
gou-gou terug.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Ag Pleez Deddy, Jeremy Taylor
I remember a trip with a friend of my mother
she took us kids to see something or other
as we enjoyed the ride in a strange car, she
and her husband started to sing in unison
creating a wonderful bubble of warmth, en-
sconcing us in the safety of camaraderie as
happy and carefree, as beautiful and
reassuring as sunshine to me
They sang Jeremy Taylor’s humourous song
‘Ag Pleez Deddy’, her voice round and sweet
his deep and strong, the refrain like a trip to a
funfair: Popcorn, chewing gum, peanuts and
bubblegum, ice-cream, candyfloss and Eskimo
pie’ - the first time I realized what a fun song
it was, the memory of that happy feeling for-
ever embedded in the melody and words
When I got hold of the words later on, I tried
to memorize them to keep the memory of
those wonderful moments alive for ever
and ever to come
http://www.lyricstime.com/jeremy-taylor-ag-pleez-deddy-lyrics.html
Jeremy Taylor
Ag pleez Deddy won't you take us to the drive-in
All six, seven of us, eight, nine, ten, We wanna
see a flick about Tarzan an' the Ape-men, An'
when the show is over you can bring us back again
Chorus:
Popcorn, chewing gum, peanuts an' bubble gum
Ice cream, candy floss an' Eskimo Pie
Ag Deddy how we miss licorice and lollipops
Pepsi Cola, ginger beer and Canada Dry
she took us kids to see something or other
as we enjoyed the ride in a strange car, she
and her husband started to sing in unison
creating a wonderful bubble of warmth, en-
sconcing us in the safety of camaraderie as
happy and carefree, as beautiful and
reassuring as sunshine to me
They sang Jeremy Taylor’s humourous song
‘Ag Pleez Deddy’, her voice round and sweet
his deep and strong, the refrain like a trip to a
funfair: Popcorn, chewing gum, peanuts and
bubblegum, ice-cream, candyfloss and Eskimo
pie’ - the first time I realized what a fun song
it was, the memory of that happy feeling for-
ever embedded in the melody and words
When I got hold of the words later on, I tried
to memorize them to keep the memory of
those wonderful moments alive for ever
and ever to come
http://www.lyricstime.com/jeremy-taylor-ag-pleez-deddy-lyrics.html
Jeremy Taylor
Ag pleez Deddy won't you take us to the drive-in
All six, seven of us, eight, nine, ten, We wanna
see a flick about Tarzan an' the Ape-men, An'
when the show is over you can bring us back again
Chorus:
Popcorn, chewing gum, peanuts an' bubble gum
Ice cream, candy floss an' Eskimo Pie
Ag Deddy how we miss licorice and lollipops
Pepsi Cola, ginger beer and Canada Dry
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Celestial Ecstasy In Divine Mystery
Satinover’s ‘Bible Code Truth’ published
by Sidgwick, delightful parallels between
Cryptology and Judaism, the Torah and
Quantum Mechanics, celestial ecstasy in
the divine mystery of the Torah preserved
without changes over millenia - Why do
trained scribes copy the Torah by hand
without making any mistakes?
‘Omit or change a single iota from the
Torah and you destroy the universe’
rings an ominous cry, relating to the
Christian Scriptures: ‘Not the smallest
letter, not the stroke of a pen, will dis-
appear from the Torah until all is ac-
complished’. Three probable Gulf War
dates were found in close proximity
in Torah Text Gulf War reference, on the
closest one of them - 18 January 1991 -
the first scud* fell on Tell Aviv, with very
little effect, 39 scuds hit Israel without any
fatality, President Herzog claimed Divine
Intervention, General Moshe Bar Kochba
exclaimed ‘I have no rational explanation
for these wondrous events!’
Nachman Shai declared ‘The Butcher from
Baghdad* threatened to incinerate half of
Israel; our salvation is beyond all under-
standing, such a wondrous example of the
miraculous’ – I bow my head, in awe and
respect for the sacred ground I tread...
Quoted from Dr Jeffrey Satinover “The Truth
Behind The Bible Code” Sidgwick and Jackson,
1997, pp. 4-5, 173-182
Torah = First five books of the Bible, Iraqi scud missiles,
President Chaim Herzog, Saddam Hussein, General
Moshe Bar Kochba, Brigadier General Nachman Shai
by Sidgwick, delightful parallels between
Cryptology and Judaism, the Torah and
Quantum Mechanics, celestial ecstasy in
the divine mystery of the Torah preserved
without changes over millenia - Why do
trained scribes copy the Torah by hand
without making any mistakes?
‘Omit or change a single iota from the
Torah and you destroy the universe’
rings an ominous cry, relating to the
Christian Scriptures: ‘Not the smallest
letter, not the stroke of a pen, will dis-
appear from the Torah until all is ac-
complished’. Three probable Gulf War
dates were found in close proximity
in Torah Text Gulf War reference, on the
closest one of them - 18 January 1991 -
the first scud* fell on Tell Aviv, with very
little effect, 39 scuds hit Israel without any
fatality, President Herzog claimed Divine
Intervention, General Moshe Bar Kochba
exclaimed ‘I have no rational explanation
for these wondrous events!’
Nachman Shai declared ‘The Butcher from
Baghdad* threatened to incinerate half of
Israel; our salvation is beyond all under-
standing, such a wondrous example of the
miraculous’ – I bow my head, in awe and
respect for the sacred ground I tread...
Quoted from Dr Jeffrey Satinover “The Truth
Behind The Bible Code” Sidgwick and Jackson,
1997, pp. 4-5, 173-182
Torah = First five books of the Bible, Iraqi scud missiles,
President Chaim Herzog, Saddam Hussein, General
Moshe Bar Kochba, Brigadier General Nachman Shai
Tragedy Of Herculean Proportions
Brought hubby’s wrath down on my head by
buying a new book, reading non-stop, buying
pizza’s instead of preparing the obligatory bland
dinner, then declaring with arrogance that since
I ate pizza, I cannot concentrate
Without sailing on my stomach in public humiliation
for my terrible shortcomings, a tragedy of Herculean
proportions, driving a wooden stake through hubby’s
sorely tried heart, he prepares dishes without spices,
curtailing his evolving talent and creativity
While I eat spicy pizza in an act of unheard-of effrontery
giving rise to suspicions of the most criminal tendencies
in my atrocious behaviour! Oi vey, guess who will bow and
kiss the floor tomorrow all day long... Forgive my saying so,
but no-one who tasted freedom can return
Willingly to humble service! Feminism probably means
something, I had to make a new list of how to behave to
win the favour of the Big Chief, maybe we should move
on from the Middle Ages one day...
buying a new book, reading non-stop, buying
pizza’s instead of preparing the obligatory bland
dinner, then declaring with arrogance that since
I ate pizza, I cannot concentrate
Without sailing on my stomach in public humiliation
for my terrible shortcomings, a tragedy of Herculean
proportions, driving a wooden stake through hubby’s
sorely tried heart, he prepares dishes without spices,
curtailing his evolving talent and creativity
While I eat spicy pizza in an act of unheard-of effrontery
giving rise to suspicions of the most criminal tendencies
in my atrocious behaviour! Oi vey, guess who will bow and
kiss the floor tomorrow all day long... Forgive my saying so,
but no-one who tasted freedom can return
Willingly to humble service! Feminism probably means
something, I had to make a new list of how to behave to
win the favour of the Big Chief, maybe we should move
on from the Middle Ages one day...
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Bully Beef Tin, Lovely Rhythm
While mom taught us to play Schubert and Chopin
dad listened to Chris Blignaut, opera singer
who came up with his own songs like ‘The
baboon wireless being a bully beef tin’
with a lovely rhythm
Just the thing to brighten the atmosphere
singing Ave Verum is fine, but not all
the time, a bit of light relief is
just the thing to add
spice to life!
********************************************
Boggom In Die Boeliebiefblik
Terwyl ma ons leer om Schubert en Chopin op die
klavier speel, luister pa na Chris Blignaut, eens
operasanger wat sy eie ligte musiek sing van ‘n
boeliebiefblik as die apie se ou draadloos
terwyl ma haar tong meewarig klik
Dit was heerlik om op maat van die musiek rond te
spring, jare later het pa vir my die woorde afge-
skryf sodat ek saam kon sing - wat ma moes dink
skeel my min, enige lied wat so lekker sing, vorm
deel van my repertoire, ek hou van afwisseling
'Berge swart gemantel en denne donker dreigend
teen die awendlug’ is goed en wel, maar ligte
vermaak is net die ding om die lewe op te
kikker, die apie skep heerlik atmosfeer
om mismoedigheid af te weer
En ‘n glimlag na die kwaaiste
gesig te bring…
****************************************************
Die Apie Se Ou Draadloos – Chris Blignaut
O die apie sit en droom
in die tak van ‘n Bosveldboom
en die bobbejaan kom met sy stert so krom
hy sien hom in die Bosveldboom,
hy kom so saggies met ‘n lag-lag-laggies,
hy spring van die spruit se wal,
maar die bobbejaan dom,
met sy stert so krom,
hy’t onder in die water geval
Oom Boggom in die waterstroom
en die aap in die Bosveldboom,
die aap sit hoog, die aap sit droog,
Adoons is nat en die water spat
Oom Boggom in die waterstroom
O die apie se ou draadloos
maak oom bobbejaan so boos,
dis ‘n boeliebiefblik in ‘n boom se mik,
is die apie so ou draadloos
en die bobbejaan kom
met sy stert so krom,
hy loer in die bloeliebiefblik,
dis ‘n blik wat pas en sy bek sit vas
oom bobbejaan het groot geskrik,
Oom Boggom in die boeliebiefblik,
Adoonsie het so groot geskrik,
hy ruk en pluk, daar’s miere in die blik,
hy skop soos ‘n perd, kry dorings in sy stert,
Oom Boggom in die boeliebiefblik
O die apies sit in ‘n kring
om die boeliebiefblik en sing
en die bobbejaan kom
met sy stert so krom,
en die apie sê vir hom
kom groet nou jou nasie
deur die uitsaaistasie, maar
die bobbejaan hy word asvaal
ou maat jy’s laat, as ons eers praat
sal ons opgaf moet betaal
Ou boggem-generaal,
hy wil nie taks betaal,
ek is nie gek, ek hou my bek,
ou maat jy’s laat, as ons eers praat,
sal ons opgaf moet betaal.
dad listened to Chris Blignaut, opera singer
who came up with his own songs like ‘The
baboon wireless being a bully beef tin’
with a lovely rhythm
Just the thing to brighten the atmosphere
singing Ave Verum is fine, but not all
the time, a bit of light relief is
just the thing to add
spice to life!
********************************************
Boggom In Die Boeliebiefblik
Terwyl ma ons leer om Schubert en Chopin op die
klavier speel, luister pa na Chris Blignaut, eens
operasanger wat sy eie ligte musiek sing van ‘n
boeliebiefblik as die apie se ou draadloos
terwyl ma haar tong meewarig klik
Dit was heerlik om op maat van die musiek rond te
spring, jare later het pa vir my die woorde afge-
skryf sodat ek saam kon sing - wat ma moes dink
skeel my min, enige lied wat so lekker sing, vorm
deel van my repertoire, ek hou van afwisseling
'Berge swart gemantel en denne donker dreigend
teen die awendlug’ is goed en wel, maar ligte
vermaak is net die ding om die lewe op te
kikker, die apie skep heerlik atmosfeer
om mismoedigheid af te weer
En ‘n glimlag na die kwaaiste
gesig te bring…
****************************************************
Die Apie Se Ou Draadloos – Chris Blignaut
O die apie sit en droom
in die tak van ‘n Bosveldboom
en die bobbejaan kom met sy stert so krom
hy sien hom in die Bosveldboom,
hy kom so saggies met ‘n lag-lag-laggies,
hy spring van die spruit se wal,
maar die bobbejaan dom,
met sy stert so krom,
hy’t onder in die water geval
Oom Boggom in die waterstroom
en die aap in die Bosveldboom,
die aap sit hoog, die aap sit droog,
Adoons is nat en die water spat
Oom Boggom in die waterstroom
O die apie se ou draadloos
maak oom bobbejaan so boos,
dis ‘n boeliebiefblik in ‘n boom se mik,
is die apie so ou draadloos
en die bobbejaan kom
met sy stert so krom,
hy loer in die bloeliebiefblik,
dis ‘n blik wat pas en sy bek sit vas
oom bobbejaan het groot geskrik,
Oom Boggom in die boeliebiefblik,
Adoonsie het so groot geskrik,
hy ruk en pluk, daar’s miere in die blik,
hy skop soos ‘n perd, kry dorings in sy stert,
Oom Boggom in die boeliebiefblik
O die apies sit in ‘n kring
om die boeliebiefblik en sing
en die bobbejaan kom
met sy stert so krom,
en die apie sê vir hom
kom groet nou jou nasie
deur die uitsaaistasie, maar
die bobbejaan hy word asvaal
ou maat jy’s laat, as ons eers praat
sal ons opgaf moet betaal
Ou boggem-generaal,
hy wil nie taks betaal,
ek is nie gek, ek hou my bek,
ou maat jy’s laat, as ons eers praat,
sal ons opgaf moet betaal.
Broccoli‘s Brilliant Prospect
Jane’s open-window campaign is doomed
the Anglo Boer war will be fought again, the
the open-plan office tribe, led by June-the-Hun
concluded that opening windows when there is
central air-conditioning is a criminal deed
I told June I was requested to open the window
under factotum Chris’ governance as instructed
by Jane, she seized the sword of justice like a
true Jean d’Arc of old; mounted the steed of
the righteous, ready to take on
The gallant knight Chris in shining armour who
gallops in to open the window at lunch when
Jane, fair damsel in distress, summons him
to save her from suffocating in the oppres-
sive air-conditioning temperature by which
I am plotting an ill-fated attempt on the life
of James Bond in the movie that will be made
on our premises, as soon as Broccoli cottons
on to the brilliant prospect…
the Anglo Boer war will be fought again, the
the open-plan office tribe, led by June-the-Hun
concluded that opening windows when there is
central air-conditioning is a criminal deed
I told June I was requested to open the window
under factotum Chris’ governance as instructed
by Jane, she seized the sword of justice like a
true Jean d’Arc of old; mounted the steed of
the righteous, ready to take on
The gallant knight Chris in shining armour who
gallops in to open the window at lunch when
Jane, fair damsel in distress, summons him
to save her from suffocating in the oppres-
sive air-conditioning temperature by which
I am plotting an ill-fated attempt on the life
of James Bond in the movie that will be made
on our premises, as soon as Broccoli cottons
on to the brilliant prospect…
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
A Scream On High C
Heat and fatigue, do not call me to watch
TV, I cannot feign interest when feverish,
a fire burning in my forehead, flames in
my cheeks, let me escape into my book
The cosmos is consciousness expressing at
specific frequencies, different planes exist
simultaneously in spacetime, an orchestra
playing, a hundred instruments occupying
The same place in space, we can distinguish
and listen to specific notes, frequencies do not
displace one another, all complementing
each other in living melodies
Our physical world is just one expression of
a manifold possibilities, a background hum on
the note of B-flat detected by physicists in
this vibratory universe
I am vibrating to a scream on high C, the Magic
Flute Queen-of-the-Night in Mozart’s opera is
singing a razor-sharp aria in me, yet reading
about reality as a spiritual entity
Lifts thoughts away from my body to a world
view of wonder, creating enough space to
set me free from the debilitating symptoms
of the allergy...
Deepak Chopra “Life After Death” Rider, Ebury
Publishing 2006, quotes from pp 2&3
TV, I cannot feign interest when feverish,
a fire burning in my forehead, flames in
my cheeks, let me escape into my book
The cosmos is consciousness expressing at
specific frequencies, different planes exist
simultaneously in spacetime, an orchestra
playing, a hundred instruments occupying
The same place in space, we can distinguish
and listen to specific notes, frequencies do not
displace one another, all complementing
each other in living melodies
Our physical world is just one expression of
a manifold possibilities, a background hum on
the note of B-flat detected by physicists in
this vibratory universe
I am vibrating to a scream on high C, the Magic
Flute Queen-of-the-Night in Mozart’s opera is
singing a razor-sharp aria in me, yet reading
about reality as a spiritual entity
Lifts thoughts away from my body to a world
view of wonder, creating enough space to
set me free from the debilitating symptoms
of the allergy...
Deepak Chopra “Life After Death” Rider, Ebury
Publishing 2006, quotes from pp 2&3
Warfare In My Head
The end of my powers, cannot prevent the
headache from invading neck and ears
sitting here because the desire to be
productive gives meaning to life
Concentration lost, contemplating interesting
aspects of life, the reason for being on earth
in this velvet moment of muffled sounds, in
the open-plan office’s calm atmosphere
All is goodwill and cheer, Jane driving an open-
window campaign, crawling under or climbing
over desks to open windows, fighting James
with or without factotum Chris’ assistance
Fresh air clearing her head, she says, Hanlie does
not care while June belligerently fights recalcitrant
terms to make adjectival clauses clear - it is a
privilege to be here, being the incumbent
Sitting in her chair, sending my mind everywhere
dissecting ideas, my brain happily engaged in
controlled maneuvers, firing neurons
warfare in my head…
headache from invading neck and ears
sitting here because the desire to be
productive gives meaning to life
Concentration lost, contemplating interesting
aspects of life, the reason for being on earth
in this velvet moment of muffled sounds, in
the open-plan office’s calm atmosphere
All is goodwill and cheer, Jane driving an open-
window campaign, crawling under or climbing
over desks to open windows, fighting James
with or without factotum Chris’ assistance
Fresh air clearing her head, she says, Hanlie does
not care while June belligerently fights recalcitrant
terms to make adjectival clauses clear - it is a
privilege to be here, being the incumbent
Sitting in her chair, sending my mind everywhere
dissecting ideas, my brain happily engaged in
controlled maneuvers, firing neurons
warfare in my head…
The Beauty Of Being
Mind going up and down, falling in response to
headache growing, rising again with new ideas
found in Deepak Chopra’s book ‘Life After Death’
Focusing on the most appealing thoughts found
here and in cyberspace, life is a race to find the
most beautiful thought, already amassed
Treasures shining brilliantly in the darkness of
modern ideas, adoring the concept of love as
free, without restriction, governed by wisdom
Separate from loyalty and trust, justice and religion
unconditional love offered as naturally as oxygen
not confused with requirements and needs
Appreciating the beauty of being, the delight of
innocence, the soothing harmonies of loving
melodies, free from expectation
Freely offered for the joy it gives me, asking no
counter-action, no affirmation, only willingness
to express feelings honestly
Without concern for personal gain or advantage
except the comfort of love…
headache growing, rising again with new ideas
found in Deepak Chopra’s book ‘Life After Death’
Focusing on the most appealing thoughts found
here and in cyberspace, life is a race to find the
most beautiful thought, already amassed
Treasures shining brilliantly in the darkness of
modern ideas, adoring the concept of love as
free, without restriction, governed by wisdom
Separate from loyalty and trust, justice and religion
unconditional love offered as naturally as oxygen
not confused with requirements and needs
Appreciating the beauty of being, the delight of
innocence, the soothing harmonies of loving
melodies, free from expectation
Freely offered for the joy it gives me, asking no
counter-action, no affirmation, only willingness
to express feelings honestly
Without concern for personal gain or advantage
except the comfort of love…
Live Your Dreams
Shift into a new story of your life
an improved point of attraction
the essence of your thoughts is
manifesting in life experience
whether you want it - or not
Consistent law of attraction shows
you are telling the story of how it
is now - while you are creating your
future experience right here by the
ideas in your head
Listen to yourself to determine what will
happen tomorrow, look at your recurrent
thoughts to know whether you will laugh
or cry - decide what your desire is
what you want to see
Imagine that it is already happening
describe the experience in your own
words, enjoy the reaction your vision
evokes, investigate all possibilities
without leaving your chair,
Decide how you want to
live your dreams…
an improved point of attraction
the essence of your thoughts is
manifesting in life experience
whether you want it - or not
Consistent law of attraction shows
you are telling the story of how it
is now - while you are creating your
future experience right here by the
ideas in your head
Listen to yourself to determine what will
happen tomorrow, look at your recurrent
thoughts to know whether you will laugh
or cry - decide what your desire is
what you want to see
Imagine that it is already happening
describe the experience in your own
words, enjoy the reaction your vision
evokes, investigate all possibilities
without leaving your chair,
Decide how you want to
live your dreams…
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