How Much He Loved All Of Us

[Memoirs]

Suffering from saudade, sitting in my own house

longing to go home, can’t say where home is or

should be, listening to Dr Zhivago Lara’s Theme

my dad’s favourite movie, I identify dad with Omar

Shariff losing his love Julie Christie, my dad was

 

Isolated and alone in his own house as we were all,

passing each other like ghosts in the night, as I grew

up I got to know him when a friend pointed out how

much he loved my mother and I never knew, later I

discovered how much he loved all of us and it broke

 

My heart - that he should have been so unhappy for

so long, life one big misunderstanding; he repeated

bedside stories he told us when we were small and

how he took my brother to hospital, I remember how

he made me drive his car right after I smashed mine 

 

He paid for the damages, once he helped me scrub

my feet after cutting the grass on his land, he gave

me milk with whisky when I felt ill and afterwards I

felt very ill indeed - all done in love - and I realize

how privileged I was to have him in my life, how

 

Much love he carried in his heart and I shall never

forget how serene his face was when he died - in

the end I loved him so much…