Sad Beauty

All my meditation came to naught, I am
still petrified with fear when thinking of
the Dutch document and the list with
which to prove I really exist

Got hold of a book on Sufism to wake up
my mind, discovering I think like a Sufist
in my desire to become a melody, in my
wish to be a minor tone of sad beauty

I wrote yesterday my heart opened like a
flower and the Sufi Master says the same:
The heart is a flower blooming in beauty,
spreading its perfume - perplexed

I put the book aside, cannot concentrate,
still caught in a cold fear for life that makes
me long for escape, I wish I could cry away
the anxiety in the arms of my love

But he wants peace and quiet, no problems,
he said, I respect his need and keep the fear
inside, I shall keep looking for help to release
me from this estrangement…

Dr HJ Witteveen “Universal Sufism” Element Books, 1997
p. 13 Muslih-ud-Din compares the heart to a flower that
blooms in beauty and spreads its perfume

p.27 Inayat explained the magic of his music in this way:
“My music is my thought and my thought is my emotion.
Diving into the ocean of feeling, I bring forth beautiful pearls
of melodies. Music creates feeling within me even before
others feel it. Music is my religion, to achieve perfection.”