Washing Machine Fantasy

*
The soul of my washing machine is deeply
perturbed, with ponderous slowness, with
languid insouciance, it contemplates every
step must take, the old rivalry between ef-
ficiency, the washing machine and me
surfacing again

The washing machine detests me and my
frivolous ways, I dared change its sacred
settings, now it sulks, refusing to move to
new cycles, stops mid-action to meditate;
FM Classic playing Vivaldi which drives
me to totally mad

I refuse to play the machine’s handmaiden,
interfere with every cycle, add extra water,
this machine has been my Nemesis since
Day One but I shall overcome, I am doing
the washing on MY terms, double-quick,
super-efficient

Refusing to bow to the rules laid down by
machine programmers, such slow progress
would drive a saint nuts and I am no saint,
I have no patience at all, I delight in taking
shortcuts when the ways of yore are mere
tradition, meaningless in itself

I’ll show the washing machine I know my
rights as a human being - entitled to
innovation and freedom!
*