but as I did so you got angry, why, what did
I expect you to do - you growled - growing
angry already - nothing, I sighed - wanted
to get this off my chest but since you can-
not deal with it, total change of plans
No more confidence; what is for dinner, what
on TV, how are you doing, isn’t it great when
the sun shows a few rays – the feelings will
have to wait until I am alone, self-pity will re-
lieve the shock caused by the ball-bearings
in my brain just snapping like that, I need
to unload the heartache - to become
The calm quiet person I am required to be;
I shall let off steam by crying into the soap-
suds and describing my feelings on paper
yet impossible being embarrassed about
illegal feelings; only self-confidence is
allowed to exist, all else resembles a
landmine ready to explode
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