Mend My Evil Ways

I know worrying does not help, only working
to fulfil your dreams shows intent, brings about
desired results, but I don’t know how to tackle
my problems right now, how to channel money
which flows in abundance, to my own dream

How to get rid of debt, start again, follow
rules that will keep my credit bill clean, the
story is that I earn enough but spend it all
wrong, now I have an ideal I have no cash
a desire more dear than anything else, but
I surrendered my money to someone else

He is better with finances, he decides on
holidays and tools, cameras, lenses; while
I am dreaming of music, buying expensive
felt to fix ebony piano keys, and I am dumb
I cannot state my own case, cannot ask for
money, having spent wrongly in the past

How can I mend my evil ways, pay for the
dreams that fill my nights and days, an ob-
session with this problem taking over my
life, losing interest in everything, feeling
numb and dead, pain in my head, malaise
give me medicine, make we whole

Bring back my soul, give me enthusiasm,
feeling and passion, wake up the part of
my brain that fell asleep, open me up to
the beautiful thought, send my spirit
some power, take the pain away…